So we have arrived!
Time here is 9:57 pm on Tuesday, May 11. And after a day of flying and not sleeping too well, I'm going to make this a short one and go to bed soon-ish.
After a few flight delays, we finally go to Berlin around 2:45-ish where Kelley and Aaron met us and loaded up our stuff in the car. Aaron then took us by the subway to the place where we were staying. After unloading, we went over to the Philips' for a late lunch where we met the Rammings who are part of the Berlin team, then took a walk around town to help us stay awake and get over the jetlag. So now we're all tired and ready to go to bed.
Pictures
Tomorrow, we're taking the Brandenburg tour. Pictures to come.
Night world.
12 May 2010
10 May 2010
Today I was in the Company of Saints...
Today I was in the company of Saints.
They sat and had coffee with me,
Shared with me about their lives
And listened to my stories.
Today I was in the company of Saints.
They laughed with me
As we tossed a frisbee around
And idled the hours of a summer afternoon away.
Today I was in the company of Saints.
They reminded me of who I was
When we first started this journey together
Today I was in the company of Saints.
They spoke to my soul and
Reminded me that leaving is never easy
And allowed me to cry.
Today I was in the company of Saints.
They held my hand when I lost a friend
And today they hold my hand again
As a new chapter unfolds
Today I was in the company of Saints
Who painted my face
Colours I would never have imagined possible
And laughed. And loved.
Today I was in the company of Saints
Who knew they would never completely understand
The quirks of my generation
But they still try anyway.
Today I was in the company of Saints
Saints whose giant footprints
Can only leave me trailing in the dust
Who would still hold me hand
And help me along with my baby-steps
Whose tears of joy celebrate each step I take
Who would take time to share a meal with me
And pray and anoint me with oil
Today I was in the company of Saints
I don't know who I am to have been in their company
But for each one of these gentle giants,
I'm thankful.
They sat and had coffee with me,
Shared with me about their lives
And listened to my stories.
Today I was in the company of Saints.
They laughed with me
As we tossed a frisbee around
And idled the hours of a summer afternoon away.
Today I was in the company of Saints.
They reminded me of who I was
When we first started this journey together
Today I was in the company of Saints.
They spoke to my soul and
Reminded me that leaving is never easy
And allowed me to cry.
Today I was in the company of Saints.
They held my hand when I lost a friend
And today they hold my hand again
As a new chapter unfolds
Today I was in the company of Saints
Who painted my face
Colours I would never have imagined possible
And laughed. And loved.
Today I was in the company of Saints
Who knew they would never completely understand
The quirks of my generation
But they still try anyway.
Today I was in the company of Saints
Saints whose giant footprints
Can only leave me trailing in the dust
Who would still hold me hand
And help me along with my baby-steps
Whose tears of joy celebrate each step I take
Who would take time to share a meal with me
And pray and anoint me with oil
Today I was in the company of Saints
I don't know who I am to have been in their company
But for each one of these gentle giants,
I'm thankful.
06 May 2010
'Twas the Week Before Berlin...
This week marks the end of my second year of seminary. Wow, really? How could I have survived two years of madness?
This has been a week of closure.
... Two finals and an exegesis paper ended off the academic year.
... A frisbee golf game and coffee sent off a few new friends to their summer vacation.
... Thai Smile dinner date with two dear friends I started seminary with to celebrate one of us graduating.
... Played a gig for a friend's youth group to return the favour for their involvement in "Akan Datang," and to round up having survived another crazy year of seminary together.
... One final breakfast + lunch date + SnoCastle season opening + dinner date with soul friends before the summer hits and some move away.
... Farewell send-off at work.
... "The usual" + a wedding shower for an old but dear friend.
... Sleeping over with two of the girls who have blessed my life this semester.
... One last soccer game with the kids from church who, together with their parents, have blessed my heart with laughter.
... AU's Graduation and all the graduation receptions and open houses to go to.
... Send-off at church
And then we're off to Berlin.
I'll be honest. The depth of some of these relationships have truly left me bewildered. How did we in such a short time find our hearts knitted so closely together that when the time comes for our paths to head off in different directions, a piece of my heart walks away with you?
I have no answer. But I can only pray that my relationships in Berlin will find that same kind of root and that I'll continue to leave pieces of my heart with the people who bless my life even if it means my heart needs to be broken for that to happen.
'Twas the week before Berlin...
My hands are small, I know,
But they're not yours,
They are my own
And I am never broken
This has been a week of closure.
... Two finals and an exegesis paper ended off the academic year.
... A frisbee golf game and coffee sent off a few new friends to their summer vacation.
... Thai Smile dinner date with two dear friends I started seminary with to celebrate one of us graduating.
... Played a gig for a friend's youth group to return the favour for their involvement in "Akan Datang," and to round up having survived another crazy year of seminary together.
... One final breakfast + lunch date + SnoCastle season opening + dinner date with soul friends before the summer hits and some move away.
... Farewell send-off at work.
... "The usual" + a wedding shower for an old but dear friend.
... Sleeping over with two of the girls who have blessed my life this semester.
... One last soccer game with the kids from church who, together with their parents, have blessed my heart with laughter.
... AU's Graduation and all the graduation receptions and open houses to go to.
... Send-off at church
And then we're off to Berlin.
I'll be honest. The depth of some of these relationships have truly left me bewildered. How did we in such a short time find our hearts knitted so closely together that when the time comes for our paths to head off in different directions, a piece of my heart walks away with you?
I have no answer. But I can only pray that my relationships in Berlin will find that same kind of root and that I'll continue to leave pieces of my heart with the people who bless my life even if it means my heart needs to be broken for that to happen.
'Twas the week before Berlin...
My hands are small, I know,
But they're not yours,
They are my own
And I am never broken
26 April 2010
Grappling...
Well, hello blogger world. It's been a while, hasn't it?
Alright, here's a quick update on the fundraising...
As of this past Tuesday, funds going toward all my expenses for Berlin have come in. YAY God, and Mum and Dad and my brother, and all the other co-workers and church friends!
At Akan Datang, the fundraising concert and silent auction that took place last night, funds that came in reached a total of around $1,000. The exact figure is still to be determined because of a few minor hiccups from last night.
YAY!
Big thanks to...
... Gary and Thonja Nicholson who so wonderfully pulled together the silent-auction!
... Daniel, Tim and Jim the set-up and tear-down crew!
... Carma and Loretta for pulling all the details together!
... Park Place Church of God!
... friends from AU, AUSOT, CCCHOG, and all the people I know from the office and who knows where else for coming out!
... and finally, the band, for all the time you put into this gig and for making it so much fun to make music with you guys!
Love you all, and keep watching this space for updates!
Alright, here's a quick update on the fundraising...
As of this past Tuesday, funds going toward all my expenses for Berlin have come in. YAY God, and Mum and Dad and my brother, and all the other co-workers and church friends!
At Akan Datang, the fundraising concert and silent auction that took place last night, funds that came in reached a total of around $1,000. The exact figure is still to be determined because of a few minor hiccups from last night.
YAY!
Big thanks to...
... Gary and Thonja Nicholson who so wonderfully pulled together the silent-auction!
... Daniel, Tim and Jim the set-up and tear-down crew!
... Carma and Loretta for pulling all the details together!
... Park Place Church of God!
... friends from AU, AUSOT, CCCHOG, and all the people I know from the office and who knows where else for coming out!
... and finally, the band, for all the time you put into this gig and for making it so much fun to make music with you guys!
Love you all, and keep watching this space for updates!
19 April 2010
Love's Hangover
Yesterday, I drove down to Noblesville after a few painful hours in the library to go see an old college friend's new business. What I saw really fascinated me.It was one of those things that caught my attention when Emily first started sending stuff out on Facebook. I kept wanting to go check it out but it never happened till now - and only because Emily had asked if I would be interested in going in on something with them to help with my fundraising. They call themselves "Love's Hangover." What it is is a fashion business that brings together little pockets of culture from all around the world. The one necklace that caught my attention was a kind of odd-coloured one with mostly browns and a few random spots of greens and reds - a fusion of Latin American and Kenyan beads and seeds.
So armed with a huge bundle of similar necklaces, bracelets and other fashion items either handmade by Emily herself, her friends or family members all around the world, I came back to Anderson with more items for my silent auction.
The business is run by Emily and her sister Irene. They make and sell jewelry, but also have classes to teach people to bead. At the shop, you find a wide selection of all kinds of jewelry and other fashion items such as crocheted purses and sweaters for babies. Emily told me they have a fairly busy schedule, having been invited to several locations to do a show of what they are doing. This Thursday, they will be at IUPUI.The other part that fascinated me about what they were doing is how much they want to be involved in the community. They've been supporting other fundraising causes and when she found out I was going to Germany, she contacted to me to ask if we could do something together.
And then we got into a conversation about what I was doing in Germany. "You never looked like the type who would go be a preacher somewhere and hit people on the head with a Bible. So what exactly are you doing there?" The easiest way I knew how to answer was, "Well, one of the things we might get to do is to hang out at the coffeeshop in a redlight district. Things like that that involve being the church outside of a building. Someone once jokingly mentioned that basically this internship involves me drinking coffee with prostitutes. That may not be a bad way to sum it up."
After I said that, Emily and Daria, a mutual friend of ours, were both intrigued that I was allowed by the church to do something as unconventional as this. It seemed in their experience, the church was a cold, legalistic institution that sent missionaries to hit people on the head with a Bible until they "get saved."
It was a strange feeling of fresh air, being reminded that in this increasingly post-modern, post-Christian part of the world that we live in, some may no longer believe in the institution. But they still believe in the future and the hope and the love of a Greater Being. And they believe in doing good to and for others even if these things are not done within a building or using the name of a church or a title such as pastor or missionary.
If you'd like to find out more about what Love's Hangover is doing, you can find them on Facebook. Or check out their store in Noblesville, located at 159 N 9th St. If you're heading there from Anderson, take 32 all the way to Noblesville till you hit 9th St. Take a right at 9th and go past Logan St. You'll see Key Bank on the right and a parking lot on the left. Culture Shock, the name of their store, is located just before the parking lot. Feel free to use the parking space there, and let them know you found out about their shop through this blog. They'll be nice to you.
And hey, come on out to the concert and silent auction this Saturday and check out some of the stuff they have. It's on April 24, 6 pm at Park Place Church of God Newberry Room. See you there!
16 April 2010
Walk With Me...
Though youths grow weary and tired,
And vigorous young men stumble badly,
Yet those who wait for the LORD
Will gain new strength;
They will mount up with wings like eagles,
They will run and not get tired,
They will walk and not become weary.
- Isaiah 40:30-31
"I used to think that the ability to soar is the highest level of attainment. I've been thinking about that scripture again recently. Anyone can soar in the good times, but true strength comes in the ability to put one foot in front of another and being completely dependent on God." - Ann Smith
I've been wallowing a lot lately. I guess a part of it is the fact that I still live in a college town where community continues to be transitional and another transition season is just around the corner. You can smell it in the spring breeze already. Another baccaleaurate and commencement Saturday is sneaking up.
But this year, I think there's a little more wallowing than the usual. I'm also wallowing in the fact that this will be my first summer in the last 6 years that will not be spent in Anderson. If you haven't already caught on, yes, I'm a very sentimental person. Perhaps a little too sentimental every once in a while.
The deepest, darkest shades of the wallowing comes out with the people I would trust with my life. Not that I've truly completely lost all hope. But the confidence in the community allows me to get to the point of complete abandonment in the darkest shades of wallowing, knowing that this community is still rooting for me, believing that deep under the layers of wallowing, there's still a beacon of hope that I don't think I'll ever find the ability to let go of.
This evening, I was getting into my car to head home. But the sun was still up, and it didn't feel right to leave campus yet. So I took a walk around campus on one of my old routes. Somewhere after the halfway mark on that route, I was hit with image after image of faces that I had taken walks around the vicinity of the campus with, and the seasons and times - both of life and of the climate - that we had walked.
And then the words from my conversation with Ann earlier today hit me.
Anyone can soar in the good times, but true strength comes in the ability to put one foot in front of another and being completely dependent on God.
And then I thought about all the people I've taken that walk with.
And how we put one foot in front of another shoulder-to-shoulder.
And how we wallowed together from time to time.
And how I found God in them.
And then, I'm thankful.
And vigorous young men stumble badly,
Yet those who wait for the LORD
Will gain new strength;
They will mount up with wings like eagles,
They will run and not get tired,
They will walk and not become weary.
- Isaiah 40:30-31
"I used to think that the ability to soar is the highest level of attainment. I've been thinking about that scripture again recently. Anyone can soar in the good times, but true strength comes in the ability to put one foot in front of another and being completely dependent on God." - Ann Smith
I've been wallowing a lot lately. I guess a part of it is the fact that I still live in a college town where community continues to be transitional and another transition season is just around the corner. You can smell it in the spring breeze already. Another baccaleaurate and commencement Saturday is sneaking up.
But this year, I think there's a little more wallowing than the usual. I'm also wallowing in the fact that this will be my first summer in the last 6 years that will not be spent in Anderson. If you haven't already caught on, yes, I'm a very sentimental person. Perhaps a little too sentimental every once in a while.
The deepest, darkest shades of the wallowing comes out with the people I would trust with my life. Not that I've truly completely lost all hope. But the confidence in the community allows me to get to the point of complete abandonment in the darkest shades of wallowing, knowing that this community is still rooting for me, believing that deep under the layers of wallowing, there's still a beacon of hope that I don't think I'll ever find the ability to let go of.
This evening, I was getting into my car to head home. But the sun was still up, and it didn't feel right to leave campus yet. So I took a walk around campus on one of my old routes. Somewhere after the halfway mark on that route, I was hit with image after image of faces that I had taken walks around the vicinity of the campus with, and the seasons and times - both of life and of the climate - that we had walked.
And then the words from my conversation with Ann earlier today hit me.
Anyone can soar in the good times, but true strength comes in the ability to put one foot in front of another and being completely dependent on God.
And then I thought about all the people I've taken that walk with.
And how we put one foot in front of another shoulder-to-shoulder.
And how we wallowed together from time to time.
And how I found God in them.
And then, I'm thankful.
11 April 2010
They Never Taught us How to say Goodbye
Caity and I were talking over lunch the other day about a conversation I had with Paula.
In all our years of schooling, they prepared us to take tests, write impressive resumes and get decent jobs. But nobody ever taught us how to write resignation letters.
Is it just that society doesn't believe that even good things come to an end?
I've done my share of "see you again"s, so I know what that's about, and I'm not talking about that. What about saying goodbye to things we've enjoyed even though it's not been the best for us? What about letting go of the old sentimental things to embrace something new that would be better?
It's like the baby blanket that's well-used, well-loved and well-worn but no longer keeps us warm. But it's kept the monster under the bed away, kept the lightning from coming too close, and it held all the tears from all the spankings, the boo-boos and the break-ups.
I've been thinking a lot about what my relationships with people will look like when I'm in Berlin, and reflecting on the things that have changed about my current relationships with people. People in Singapore, people who no longer live in Anderson, people in Anderson and people I wished were not gone. I let go of things faster than I should so they wouldn't have a chance to hurt me and then I regret not holding on more tightly while I had the chance to.
And this is the very reason I hate transitions. I frustrate myself with the way I deal with it.
Today marks the one month countdown towards Berlin. Another transition. As with each one of these, I always love the going but hate the leaving.
But the people. It's always about the people.
If you're the praying type, say a prayer that I'll learn to love the people with all that I am wherever I am whether it's at the beginning of a season or at the end.
In all our years of schooling, they prepared us to take tests, write impressive resumes and get decent jobs. But nobody ever taught us how to write resignation letters.
Is it just that society doesn't believe that even good things come to an end?
I've done my share of "see you again"s, so I know what that's about, and I'm not talking about that. What about saying goodbye to things we've enjoyed even though it's not been the best for us? What about letting go of the old sentimental things to embrace something new that would be better?
It's like the baby blanket that's well-used, well-loved and well-worn but no longer keeps us warm. But it's kept the monster under the bed away, kept the lightning from coming too close, and it held all the tears from all the spankings, the boo-boos and the break-ups.
I've been thinking a lot about what my relationships with people will look like when I'm in Berlin, and reflecting on the things that have changed about my current relationships with people. People in Singapore, people who no longer live in Anderson, people in Anderson and people I wished were not gone. I let go of things faster than I should so they wouldn't have a chance to hurt me and then I regret not holding on more tightly while I had the chance to.
And this is the very reason I hate transitions. I frustrate myself with the way I deal with it.
Today marks the one month countdown towards Berlin. Another transition. As with each one of these, I always love the going but hate the leaving.
But the people. It's always about the people.
If you're the praying type, say a prayer that I'll learn to love the people with all that I am wherever I am whether it's at the beginning of a season or at the end.
08 April 2010
Closing Time...
Paula accidentally reminded me today that in exactly one month, I will no longer be an employee at Church of God Ministries.
Wow.
ONE month.
This kind of feels like the beginning of the end. Except it's not really the end since I will return to Anderson after Berlin. But it feels like it.
And today, I showed Kathi the invitation to one of our events at the North American Convention that I had worked on all day, and she about lost it. I'm well aware that I can get by doing the administrative stuff at work, but my passion and my gifts are in the creative side. But today, when I showed Kathi the finished project that was fairly well done, she started lamenting again that I would be leaving soon. I haven't known Kathi for very long, but I knew her well enough to know that after she gave me a hug, I would probably do best avoiding eye contact because I would not be able to handle seeing the tears in her eyes.
These are the things I will miss.
The people.
Funny how I was thinking just the other day of who I was my sophomore year when I went on my first missions trip to Atlanta. I still remember distinctly what Pastor Kurt said about how over the course of the week, there will be lots to do. "But the people are ALWAYS more important than the tasks."
Funny how it struck a chord with me then, being self-aware enough to know how task-oriented I was.
Funny how far I've come since my sophomore year.
Funny how someone up there seems to know what it really means to equip the called.
And so, now that it's closing time, I have to learn to let go of what I had to learn to love.
Funny, isn't it?
Wow.
ONE month.
This kind of feels like the beginning of the end. Except it's not really the end since I will return to Anderson after Berlin. But it feels like it.
And today, I showed Kathi the invitation to one of our events at the North American Convention that I had worked on all day, and she about lost it. I'm well aware that I can get by doing the administrative stuff at work, but my passion and my gifts are in the creative side. But today, when I showed Kathi the finished project that was fairly well done, she started lamenting again that I would be leaving soon. I haven't known Kathi for very long, but I knew her well enough to know that after she gave me a hug, I would probably do best avoiding eye contact because I would not be able to handle seeing the tears in her eyes.
These are the things I will miss.
The people.
Funny how I was thinking just the other day of who I was my sophomore year when I went on my first missions trip to Atlanta. I still remember distinctly what Pastor Kurt said about how over the course of the week, there will be lots to do. "But the people are ALWAYS more important than the tasks."
Funny how it struck a chord with me then, being self-aware enough to know how task-oriented I was.
Funny how far I've come since my sophomore year.
Funny how someone up there seems to know what it really means to equip the called.
And so, now that it's closing time, I have to learn to let go of what I had to learn to love.
Funny, isn't it?
05 April 2010
Holy Week #5: Redeeming Love
She stared blankly at the picture in front of her. Fragmented pieces of colour seemingly scattered randomly on a sheet of glass.
It had been a busy, busy week. The adrenaline from planning the services for the week was quickly fading, and now it was Sunday night. The hustle and bustle had finally died down and she finally had a few moments to sit quietly before the activities of the next week flurried by again.
"Redeeming love has been my theme, and shall be till I die..."
The words from the familiar hymn from earlier that morning rang in her head as her fingers idly traced over the outlines of each of the fragmented pieces of colour. Her eyelids were drooping but still she forced herself to try and make sense of that picture in front of her. It was a familiar one; perhaps something she had used for weeks like this in years passed. But tonight, the picture did not make sense.
She let the words ring in her head one more time. "Redeeming love has been my theme, and shall be till I die..."
Then it hit her. That picture. It was that very same picture they had portrayed earlier that day in the service. The disciples gathered around the table with the bread and the wine. It all came together now.
Nicodemus, and the "righteousness" he had learnt from his role as a religious teacher...
Mary Magdalene, and the postures of brokenness she found at the feet of the Christ...
John, and the way he completely missed the point while the Christ was in his midst...
Mary and Joseph, and the heartache of losing their child...
"I've forgotten about the music," she whispered, as the first tear rolled down her cheek
"I've forgotten what it means to pray.
Don't know why I stopped believing,
Don't know why I settled for less.
Speak to me of that man again -
He had much knowledge of the Law.
Speak to me of how he had to relearn
The wonder of who You are.
Remind me of that woman
With her alabaster jar.
Remind me to unbound my hair
And sit at Your feet for a while.
Tell me that story again
Of that man You call "Beloved."
Tell me again of how he forgot
The marvel of who You are.
Sing me the song of that broken heart
Of the woman and her husband who lost their son.
Sing me the song with Your words of comfort
And heal the brokenness of my heart."
The fragmented pieces of colour all came together now. There was room at the table for the Nicodemuses, the Mary Magdalenes, the Johns, and the Mary and Josephs.
But more importantly, there was room for her even when the flurries of activity leave little time for her to remember.
"Redeeming love has been my theme, and shall be till I die..."
It had been a busy, busy week. The adrenaline from planning the services for the week was quickly fading, and now it was Sunday night. The hustle and bustle had finally died down and she finally had a few moments to sit quietly before the activities of the next week flurried by again.
"Redeeming love has been my theme, and shall be till I die..."
The words from the familiar hymn from earlier that morning rang in her head as her fingers idly traced over the outlines of each of the fragmented pieces of colour. Her eyelids were drooping but still she forced herself to try and make sense of that picture in front of her. It was a familiar one; perhaps something she had used for weeks like this in years passed. But tonight, the picture did not make sense.
She let the words ring in her head one more time. "Redeeming love has been my theme, and shall be till I die..."
Then it hit her. That picture. It was that very same picture they had portrayed earlier that day in the service. The disciples gathered around the table with the bread and the wine. It all came together now.
Nicodemus, and the "righteousness" he had learnt from his role as a religious teacher...
Mary Magdalene, and the postures of brokenness she found at the feet of the Christ...
John, and the way he completely missed the point while the Christ was in his midst...
Mary and Joseph, and the heartache of losing their child...
"I've forgotten about the music," she whispered, as the first tear rolled down her cheek
"I've forgotten what it means to pray.
Don't know why I stopped believing,
Don't know why I settled for less.
Speak to me of that man again -
He had much knowledge of the Law.
Speak to me of how he had to relearn
The wonder of who You are.
Remind me of that woman
With her alabaster jar.
Remind me to unbound my hair
And sit at Your feet for a while.
Tell me that story again
Of that man You call "Beloved."
Tell me again of how he forgot
The marvel of who You are.
Sing me the song of that broken heart
Of the woman and her husband who lost their son.
Sing me the song with Your words of comfort
And heal the brokenness of my heart."
The fragmented pieces of colour all came together now. There was room at the table for the Nicodemuses, the Mary Magdalenes, the Johns, and the Mary and Josephs.
But more importantly, there was room for her even when the flurries of activity leave little time for her to remember.
"Redeeming love has been my theme, and shall be till I die..."
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