All day today I've been asking God, I didn't come here to fall in love with these people, so what makes you think it's ok to let that happen? And then I realised, that IS really why I came here. But still it didn't make me feel any better.
I'm still looking for answers, trying to find direction. Over coffee with Natascha on Monday, I found what I had to say to her to probably be more true for myself than for her. But ich weiss nicht. It's ok to not know.
So I leave you with this prayer that an older, wiser friend of mine shared.
And on an unrelated note, I hope the recent change in background didn't throw anyone off. Also, someone just pointed out to me that they can't comment here. I just fixed that tonight, so have at it if you would like.
On that note, here's Thomas Merton...
MY LORD GOD, I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so.
But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you.
And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it.
Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.
- Thomas Merton, "Thoughts in Solitude"
01 July 2010
29 June 2010
I Didn't Mean to Fall in Love
I'll be honest. I didn't come to Germany thinking I would fall in love with this place. Mostly because it's Europe and it's overly-romanticised. Or at least, I didn't think I'd be more in love with it than with Atlanta, or Portland or New York. But I think I might have fallen. And fallen hard.
I've already mentioned in a previous entry how much I love Berlin. The last few days in Pforzheim helped me realise another small part of why I love it - there are enough culturally mixed-up people there for me to feel at home. We don't always speak the same language, but we all find one way or another to communicate with the next person we meet on the streets.
And the big city. We already know what my heart feels about the big city. I don't know if I'm the only slow one that JUST realised the places I really fell in love with are all the big cities. And falling asleep to the sounds of the city right outside my window. And sidewalks and public transport. I thought Berlin really spoke my language.
Then I came to Pforzheim. And my heart is being stirred in a way I had not expected at all. Quite frankly, when Kelley, Rhonda, Aaron and I were talking about the possibility of me coming down here to hang out for a few days while they are in the US, I didn't think too much about it. Sure it would be great to reconnect with Manuel, an old acquaintance from AU who now pastors the church here, and to see how they do church here.
But then I had to meet Luzi, Sanna and Natascha, all of whom are descendents of Germans who had migrated to Russia years and years ago. They are the second or third generation to move back to Germany from Russia, so they talk a little bit about this identity crisis thing that they go through as a result of that.
If you know anything about what kept me sane at my office job before coming to Germany, you would know it's the missionaries and especially their children. And if you know about my fascination with Smeagol from the Lord of the Rings trilogy, you would know my fascination with people who go through this identity crisis thing.
But mostly because I identify with them, having crossed culture at a fairly young age myself. I carry with me pieces from two different worlds (and now three) that don't always mesh well together. And I often find myself at a place where I'll always be considered an outsider. I may have grown up in Singapore and carry a Singaporean passport. But I don't really belong there anymore because I left, and I'll always be considered a banana because to them - I may be yellow on the outside, but I'm white on the inside (even if that may not be true). And I definitely don't look like an Anglo, so I'll never really belong in the United States (and besides, I don't actually think like most people in at least the Midwest do).
In the last three days here in Pforzheim, I've just spent a lot of time talking to (and watching football of course) people here in the church. Natascha and I sat at a cafe for a few hours yesterday sharing our stories and I found myself close to tears on a few occasions just remembering things. Luzi and I chatted for a while till fairly late last night and again I felt something moving in my soul.
Other than Manuel, these are all people I'm meeting for the first time, but already I feel like I've known them forever. And if I'm honest with myself, I haven't felt my soul stirring like that in a long time and I miss this feeling. It feels like the rain of mercy is finally falling on the parched land of my heart and I woke up this morning with a great heaviness thinking, God, what are you doing to my heart now? I can't fall in love with this place since I'm leaving tomorrow morning.
Later today, Manuel will be visiting an older Russian-German couple from the church who are amongst the group that came back from Russia and I'll get to tag along. I'll be honest. I know how I guard myself when I'm afraid of falling in love then having to say goodbye. But I don't want to deprive myself from laughing or crying wholeheartedly when I'm spending time with this couple.
You can't win, can you? Sigh.
I really didn't mean for this entry to get so personal, but somehow it did. Hey, if you're the praying type, would you say a prayer for me?
Deutschland Fussball!
On a lighter note (and also relating to my newfound love for this place), Deutschland made it to the quarter-finals of the World Cup after a spectacular game against England! After the dirty playing by Brazil and Argentina, I guess the only favourite I have left is Deutschland since Uruguay took South Korea out. I've always enjoyed a good football game, but there's nothing like watching it with a group of Germans who not only really appreciate the game and have their own "fight songs" (and no vuvuzelas), but also have a good team to root for.
Something else that I had a conversation with someone in Berlin about (I think it might have been Aaron, but I don't remember)... The German flag is never flown around here unless it's World Cup season. And there is a sense of the German pride returning after cowering in shame for the last sixty years trying to make amends for the Second World War.
They say football brings the world together. Even in the trash-talking on Facebook with people I haven't talked to in a long time, there's still that sense of we're doing something together regardless of what time-zone you live in. And especially because at least amongst my friends who are football fans, trash-talking on Facebook becomes the love-language around World Cup season.
Alright, I hope your Tuesday is terrific, my friends. And since I can't pick between the teams playing today, I'm just going to root for fair referees and good sportsmanship.
Love you all.
I've already mentioned in a previous entry how much I love Berlin. The last few days in Pforzheim helped me realise another small part of why I love it - there are enough culturally mixed-up people there for me to feel at home. We don't always speak the same language, but we all find one way or another to communicate with the next person we meet on the streets.
And the big city. We already know what my heart feels about the big city. I don't know if I'm the only slow one that JUST realised the places I really fell in love with are all the big cities. And falling asleep to the sounds of the city right outside my window. And sidewalks and public transport. I thought Berlin really spoke my language.
Then I came to Pforzheim. And my heart is being stirred in a way I had not expected at all. Quite frankly, when Kelley, Rhonda, Aaron and I were talking about the possibility of me coming down here to hang out for a few days while they are in the US, I didn't think too much about it. Sure it would be great to reconnect with Manuel, an old acquaintance from AU who now pastors the church here, and to see how they do church here.
But then I had to meet Luzi, Sanna and Natascha, all of whom are descendents of Germans who had migrated to Russia years and years ago. They are the second or third generation to move back to Germany from Russia, so they talk a little bit about this identity crisis thing that they go through as a result of that.
If you know anything about what kept me sane at my office job before coming to Germany, you would know it's the missionaries and especially their children. And if you know about my fascination with Smeagol from the Lord of the Rings trilogy, you would know my fascination with people who go through this identity crisis thing.
But mostly because I identify with them, having crossed culture at a fairly young age myself. I carry with me pieces from two different worlds (and now three) that don't always mesh well together. And I often find myself at a place where I'll always be considered an outsider. I may have grown up in Singapore and carry a Singaporean passport. But I don't really belong there anymore because I left, and I'll always be considered a banana because to them - I may be yellow on the outside, but I'm white on the inside (even if that may not be true). And I definitely don't look like an Anglo, so I'll never really belong in the United States (and besides, I don't actually think like most people in at least the Midwest do).
In the last three days here in Pforzheim, I've just spent a lot of time talking to (and watching football of course) people here in the church. Natascha and I sat at a cafe for a few hours yesterday sharing our stories and I found myself close to tears on a few occasions just remembering things. Luzi and I chatted for a while till fairly late last night and again I felt something moving in my soul.
Other than Manuel, these are all people I'm meeting for the first time, but already I feel like I've known them forever. And if I'm honest with myself, I haven't felt my soul stirring like that in a long time and I miss this feeling. It feels like the rain of mercy is finally falling on the parched land of my heart and I woke up this morning with a great heaviness thinking, God, what are you doing to my heart now? I can't fall in love with this place since I'm leaving tomorrow morning.
Later today, Manuel will be visiting an older Russian-German couple from the church who are amongst the group that came back from Russia and I'll get to tag along. I'll be honest. I know how I guard myself when I'm afraid of falling in love then having to say goodbye. But I don't want to deprive myself from laughing or crying wholeheartedly when I'm spending time with this couple.
You can't win, can you? Sigh.
I really didn't mean for this entry to get so personal, but somehow it did. Hey, if you're the praying type, would you say a prayer for me?
Deutschland Fussball!
On a lighter note (and also relating to my newfound love for this place), Deutschland made it to the quarter-finals of the World Cup after a spectacular game against England! After the dirty playing by Brazil and Argentina, I guess the only favourite I have left is Deutschland since Uruguay took South Korea out. I've always enjoyed a good football game, but there's nothing like watching it with a group of Germans who not only really appreciate the game and have their own "fight songs" (and no vuvuzelas), but also have a good team to root for.
Something else that I had a conversation with someone in Berlin about (I think it might have been Aaron, but I don't remember)... The German flag is never flown around here unless it's World Cup season. And there is a sense of the German pride returning after cowering in shame for the last sixty years trying to make amends for the Second World War.
They say football brings the world together. Even in the trash-talking on Facebook with people I haven't talked to in a long time, there's still that sense of we're doing something together regardless of what time-zone you live in. And especially because at least amongst my friends who are football fans, trash-talking on Facebook becomes the love-language around World Cup season.
Alright, I hope your Tuesday is terrific, my friends. And since I can't pick between the teams playing today, I'm just going to root for fair referees and good sportsmanship.
Love you all.
Greetings from Pforzheim!
Really quickly...
Today's my last full day in Pforzheim where I've just spent the last three days hanging out with people from the church here. It's been a long while since I've gotten emotional about people, ministry or spiritual things. I'm not sure what it is about the people I've met so far but I keep finding myself getting teary-eyed talking to them. And after only three days of soul conversations with a bunch of different people from the church, I don't want to leave.
I should probably get ready for breakfast, but I'll write more soon.
Today's my last full day in Pforzheim where I've just spent the last three days hanging out with people from the church here. It's been a long while since I've gotten emotional about people, ministry or spiritual things. I'm not sure what it is about the people I've met so far but I keep finding myself getting teary-eyed talking to them. And after only three days of soul conversations with a bunch of different people from the church, I don't want to leave.
I should probably get ready for breakfast, but I'll write more soon.
24 June 2010
Thinking Aloud...
This week, I reconnected with some of the friends I mentioned in a previous entry. And I realised something. The fun for me isn't so much about seeing them again as much as it is about the excitement of the privilege to walk another small part of the journey with them.
Ruth
So let me tell you a bit more about Ruth and my experience at a dentist in Germany. I didn't think a visit to the dentist was going to be on my agenda while I'm here in Berlin, but it kind of turned out that way. What had started as a toothache about a month before I left for Germany became quite an incident requiring a root canal because 1) I didn't want to deal with American dentists yet, and 2) I thought I'd wait till after I'm back in Anderson before I took care of it.
So anyway, Ruth told us of her dentist and said she would go with me and act as my translator. I don't know if I mentioned this in my previous entry, but Ruth is just a fascinating lady. She's well in her 60s but is as free-spirited as it gets, and had worked as a tour-guide in Spain and England where she learnt on the job to speak Spanish and English. We got to the dentist, and I think she was a lot more excited and nervous about what needed to be done than I was. And she was almost in complete awe of how gentle and careful the dentist was and how nice she was when we talked about how we were going to settle the bill since I had to have money wired over. These were all things I appreciated, but seeing all the emotions played out through her was an interesting experience at least for me.
But mostly, it was just a joy to be spending time with her and hearing her stories. If you've ever met Ruth, you would know that you probably will never be able to guess some of the experiences she has had in her life. But at the same time, because you know her, you aren't exactly surprised. Like just yesterday, she brought me to the cemetary where the Grimm Brothers are buried. (Yes, that's right here in Kreuzberg.)
Or like, as a 12-year-old, she had wanted to start her own girl band but because she was well-ahead of her time, there wasn't enough interest amongst her peers so she dropped it.
So instead, she came over tonight and tried playing Rock Band with Christian instead. And watched Deutschland play Ghana. And of course, brought us a bowl of cherries that she bought from her friend Rita. I really don't have the words to describe her, but I guess you just have to meet her.
Justin
And then today, I ran into Justin again at the same cafe. He looked a lot happier today - more hopeful, perhaps. When we left him a couple weeks ago, I remembered him saying he was looking to get some help for his drug-addiction, but he sounded really hesitant.
Today he got to the cafe not too long after Rhonda and I got there. Rhonda was back making sandwiches and I was just hanging out when he walked in. We exchanged a quick hello and I noticed he had a little sandwich bag this time. He pulled out two rolls and start making sandwiches too. I guess I was puzzled because of the few times I've ran into him at the cafe, I had never seen him eat.
But after a while, he came and sat with us and we chatted for a bit. He's since gotten connected with a "social worker" whom he knew fairly well from a few years back who was a few years older than him. He described her as a lady he knew he could trust. He's since found housing with four other people in a "project" that was going to hopefully help him stay strong and get help. And he has a doctor's appointment tomorrow to see if they can get him off his addictions.
For me, it wasn't so much hearing that he's doing well now. No, it was the very faint glimmer in his eyes that he had found hope. And it made my heart REALLY happy when Patricia, one of the workers at the cafe was joking around with him about how he needed to pay attention to "girl-talk" because someday he might get married and he'll need to know those things.
Hope. So much hope. The story hasn't ended yet.
Gretchen
I was so happy to run into Gretchen at the cafe today. When I stopped in last Friday, Krissie, one of the workers at the cafe told me that I had JUST missed her in her splendous Deutschland outfit of a black top, red skirt and golden shoes. That was the day Deutschland lost to Serbia, and Gretchen had been all-decked out and ready to cheer on her country.
She didn't have her Deutschland colours on today, so of course I had to give her a hard time about it. But then we got to talking and I found out that she's an amazing cook and she enjoys baking and crafts and all the artsy-fartsy stuff that speaks my language. So I told her maybe the next time I run into her again she can share some of her recipes.
I've been thinking a lot these few days about all these new friends that I've made. I guess a part of it is that Kelley and Aaron left yesterday to go back to the US, and it was almost like an indicator that this season of such close interaction with these people that I've come to really know and love will soon come to an end.
Something else I've realised over the last few days. Before this past month, I've often objectified people as projects more than I've really been willing to see them for what or who they are. How many can I take care of in a given period of time so I can feel a sense of accomplishment about myself? Have I tackled enough projects to rack up a good tally to reflect my productivity?
But really, how helpful are numbers and statistics in truly reflecting productivity? Back at my office job, I could probably have answered a ton of phone-calls or e-mails, but never really know any of the people that I'm corresponding with. I could chalk up points for the number of mailings I get done or the number of missionaries I pray for, but still never really know them. Productive for an office job, I guess, but that's not quality... Not for me anyway.
And having spent the little time I've had with some of my new friends, and realising how intentional I have to be about going back to the cafe (and who knows if I'll even run into them again), I've come to realise that they are my friends. And not just projects that I can try to help in one way or another. Learning their stories one small chapter at a time makes it hard for me to just put a number on them as project #524 that I've taken care of for the day. And no, I will not let anyone reduce these friendships to a number or a statistic because they are more than numbers or statistics. They are my friends.
And to be honest, I'm really going to hate leaving here. I know these 3 months will be a lot more like a vacation deal than like real life when the "honeymoon" wears off and the annoyances set in. But at the same time, I REALLY love it here. And it's not just because Berlin is a more exciting city to live in than Anderson (even though that IS true). Everything here seems to be speaking my language (well, except for the Deutsch, but we can work around that). The people I've gotten to work with stand for everything that I believe in - and even the agreeing to talk things out and fight it out.
I've also been giving some thought to not going back to Anderson to finish seminary. I would like to stay in Berlin, but that's not the only reason I'm thinking about not returning to Anderson. Don't get me wrong, I realise the importance of higher education, but I'm also starting to wonder if seminary is for me. I love the community in Anderson. I love most of the classes I've been in. But let's be honest... I have a bit too much ADD artsy-fartsyness in me to really settle down and be academic.
At the same time, I'm also trying to listen and figure out if this is just me trying to run away, or just having an overly-romanticised idea of what it means to not live in Anderson. Hey, if you're the praying type, will you say a prayer for me?
Alright, it's getting late and there's much to do tomorrow. Congratulations to Uruguay, Mexico, Argentina, S Korea, USA, England, Germany and Ghana - and all your fans - for moving on to the next round.
Love you all.
Ruth
So let me tell you a bit more about Ruth and my experience at a dentist in Germany. I didn't think a visit to the dentist was going to be on my agenda while I'm here in Berlin, but it kind of turned out that way. What had started as a toothache about a month before I left for Germany became quite an incident requiring a root canal because 1) I didn't want to deal with American dentists yet, and 2) I thought I'd wait till after I'm back in Anderson before I took care of it.
So anyway, Ruth told us of her dentist and said she would go with me and act as my translator. I don't know if I mentioned this in my previous entry, but Ruth is just a fascinating lady. She's well in her 60s but is as free-spirited as it gets, and had worked as a tour-guide in Spain and England where she learnt on the job to speak Spanish and English. We got to the dentist, and I think she was a lot more excited and nervous about what needed to be done than I was. And she was almost in complete awe of how gentle and careful the dentist was and how nice she was when we talked about how we were going to settle the bill since I had to have money wired over. These were all things I appreciated, but seeing all the emotions played out through her was an interesting experience at least for me.
But mostly, it was just a joy to be spending time with her and hearing her stories. If you've ever met Ruth, you would know that you probably will never be able to guess some of the experiences she has had in her life. But at the same time, because you know her, you aren't exactly surprised. Like just yesterday, she brought me to the cemetary where the Grimm Brothers are buried. (Yes, that's right here in Kreuzberg.)
Or like, as a 12-year-old, she had wanted to start her own girl band but because she was well-ahead of her time, there wasn't enough interest amongst her peers so she dropped it.
So instead, she came over tonight and tried playing Rock Band with Christian instead. And watched Deutschland play Ghana. And of course, brought us a bowl of cherries that she bought from her friend Rita. I really don't have the words to describe her, but I guess you just have to meet her.
Justin
And then today, I ran into Justin again at the same cafe. He looked a lot happier today - more hopeful, perhaps. When we left him a couple weeks ago, I remembered him saying he was looking to get some help for his drug-addiction, but he sounded really hesitant.
Today he got to the cafe not too long after Rhonda and I got there. Rhonda was back making sandwiches and I was just hanging out when he walked in. We exchanged a quick hello and I noticed he had a little sandwich bag this time. He pulled out two rolls and start making sandwiches too. I guess I was puzzled because of the few times I've ran into him at the cafe, I had never seen him eat.
But after a while, he came and sat with us and we chatted for a bit. He's since gotten connected with a "social worker" whom he knew fairly well from a few years back who was a few years older than him. He described her as a lady he knew he could trust. He's since found housing with four other people in a "project" that was going to hopefully help him stay strong and get help. And he has a doctor's appointment tomorrow to see if they can get him off his addictions.
For me, it wasn't so much hearing that he's doing well now. No, it was the very faint glimmer in his eyes that he had found hope. And it made my heart REALLY happy when Patricia, one of the workers at the cafe was joking around with him about how he needed to pay attention to "girl-talk" because someday he might get married and he'll need to know those things.
Hope. So much hope. The story hasn't ended yet.
Gretchen
I was so happy to run into Gretchen at the cafe today. When I stopped in last Friday, Krissie, one of the workers at the cafe told me that I had JUST missed her in her splendous Deutschland outfit of a black top, red skirt and golden shoes. That was the day Deutschland lost to Serbia, and Gretchen had been all-decked out and ready to cheer on her country.
She didn't have her Deutschland colours on today, so of course I had to give her a hard time about it. But then we got to talking and I found out that she's an amazing cook and she enjoys baking and crafts and all the artsy-fartsy stuff that speaks my language. So I told her maybe the next time I run into her again she can share some of her recipes.
I've been thinking a lot these few days about all these new friends that I've made. I guess a part of it is that Kelley and Aaron left yesterday to go back to the US, and it was almost like an indicator that this season of such close interaction with these people that I've come to really know and love will soon come to an end.
Something else I've realised over the last few days. Before this past month, I've often objectified people as projects more than I've really been willing to see them for what or who they are. How many can I take care of in a given period of time so I can feel a sense of accomplishment about myself? Have I tackled enough projects to rack up a good tally to reflect my productivity?
But really, how helpful are numbers and statistics in truly reflecting productivity? Back at my office job, I could probably have answered a ton of phone-calls or e-mails, but never really know any of the people that I'm corresponding with. I could chalk up points for the number of mailings I get done or the number of missionaries I pray for, but still never really know them. Productive for an office job, I guess, but that's not quality... Not for me anyway.
And having spent the little time I've had with some of my new friends, and realising how intentional I have to be about going back to the cafe (and who knows if I'll even run into them again), I've come to realise that they are my friends. And not just projects that I can try to help in one way or another. Learning their stories one small chapter at a time makes it hard for me to just put a number on them as project #524 that I've taken care of for the day. And no, I will not let anyone reduce these friendships to a number or a statistic because they are more than numbers or statistics. They are my friends.
And to be honest, I'm really going to hate leaving here. I know these 3 months will be a lot more like a vacation deal than like real life when the "honeymoon" wears off and the annoyances set in. But at the same time, I REALLY love it here. And it's not just because Berlin is a more exciting city to live in than Anderson (even though that IS true). Everything here seems to be speaking my language (well, except for the Deutsch, but we can work around that). The people I've gotten to work with stand for everything that I believe in - and even the agreeing to talk things out and fight it out.
I've also been giving some thought to not going back to Anderson to finish seminary. I would like to stay in Berlin, but that's not the only reason I'm thinking about not returning to Anderson. Don't get me wrong, I realise the importance of higher education, but I'm also starting to wonder if seminary is for me. I love the community in Anderson. I love most of the classes I've been in. But let's be honest... I have a bit too much ADD artsy-fartsyness in me to really settle down and be academic.
At the same time, I'm also trying to listen and figure out if this is just me trying to run away, or just having an overly-romanticised idea of what it means to not live in Anderson. Hey, if you're the praying type, will you say a prayer for me?
Alright, it's getting late and there's much to do tomorrow. Congratulations to Uruguay, Mexico, Argentina, S Korea, USA, England, Germany and Ghana - and all your fans - for moving on to the next round.
Love you all.
17 June 2010
Call Me Mara
I had started writing this entry last Friday before the quick trip to Hannover, but it never got very much further than the title. So this one is WAY overdue, and I have much to write but I'll try to put it as succinctly as I can.
This past week, I feel like I've been invited into so many life stories. Let me tell you a few of these stories. But for privacy reasons, I've changed some of these names.
Ruth
I met Ruth one evening at Mr. Minsch, the cafe across the street from where we live. If you're ever in Kreuzberg, you need to have someone take you to Mr. Minsch. They have the best cakes we've ever tasted.
Anyway, so Ruth. She lives just below Aaron and her name had come up in several conversations previously, so of course I was intrigued. As she sat down and talked to us, there was something about the way she expressed herself that made me want to sit with her for hours. Then I realised what it was. Her quiet but intense passion for life.
I'm not sure I can find the right words to describe her, but here's my feeble attempt. If I had to explain what a hippie is, Ruth would be the personification of it. Or if there's someone who speaks Na'vi ("I see you" - yes Kelley, there's another Avatar reference for you), it would be Ruth. Ruth is someone who knew just about everyone by name. Oh, and not only by name, she could probably tell you a couple stories of their lives too. She's like a free bird, almost a drifter (she was passing by Mr. Minsch while on her bike and stopped to chat with us for about an hour). But at the same time, she's also so very grounded in reality and in touch with her community.
And then she talks about an experience she had some years back when she was really ill and described an encounter that was almost spiritual. I'm not quite sure where she lands where spirituality is concerned, but what really drew me to her was just her genuine desire to love those around her.
Tonight, she stopped by to give us some information about her dentist because my tooth has been really bothering me for about a week now. And she also shared her home remedy of simply sucking on a clove because it helps soothe the pain. I'm not sure if it was the clove or the Ibuprofin, but my tooth hasn't bothered me in awhile.
That, to me, is "one anothering."
Justin
The day after I met Ruth the first time, Rhonda and I went to another cafe at a different part of town. That's where we met Justin. I remembered seeing him with his girlfriend the last time we were at the cafe, and he was helping Amy and I explain some German grammar rules to Suzann.
That day, in really good English, Justin told us of how he learnt English when he met a guy from Scotland while he was in prison. At a young age, his parents gave him away and he ended up in the company of drug-dealers. One thing led to another and he found himself in Berlin where he lost a childhood friend in a shooting. That was when he decided to stay in Berlin.
He told us he was starting to try to figure out how to get cleaned up. He didn't like how the drugs have messed him up since a young age that now there are moments where he just can't think straight. The guy could probably have been a brilliant linguist if not for the drug use, but... Could anyone blame him?
The same time I was listening to his story, I was reminded of a similar story I had heard as a child - one that my pastor in Singapore told often: his own life story. Funny how stories connect people, huh? It was like I heard this voice in my head saying, "His story isn't over yet." I only wish I could stick around to see the rest of it unfold.
Gretchen
Now Gretchen was just a fun lady. Rhonda had left the cafe with one of the women we met there for a few minutes and I got to chat with Gretchen. She seemed to just be excited to be able to practise her English, so she told me some of the stories she knew about the regulars at the cafe.
In one corner, there was a lady who would from time to time play with her shoes, then put on one side of a rubber glove and wave her hands around as if she had nail polish on her fingers. Gretchen told me she heard that this lady had been really beautiful when she was young. But the time in a concentration camp during the Second World War really messed her up, so now she spends her days walking around the block several times, and stopping in at the cafe once in a while to take a shower.
After all we had talked about the history of Germany, hearing this story just made reality sink in a bit more. And I'm left with the question again of, now what?
Naomi
Aaron and I made a 24-hour trip to Hannover to spend some time with Sieg, Sanna and Amy Froese. I didn't physically meet Naomi there, but I encountered her story which reminded me of how all these stories all get woven together at some point.
I've never had a child of my own, so I can't say I understand what it's like to lose a child. But I have lost a very dear friend, and had the privilege of entering into her parents' journey of learning what it means to lose a child. I can't say I can or will be able to relate to Sieg and Sanna's loss of their daughter Naomi. But the night that I spent sleeping on Naomi's bed made me thankful that Sanna was willing to let me in to that part of their story even in a small way like that. And it made me think of Francisco and Martita, and of course, Keren.
And these stories all came full-circle when I stumbled upon a little duck display thing in the Froeses' bathroom that said "My name is Ruth." Funny how this all started with Ruth and ended with Naomi huh. For me, it was a reminder that these are the stories of life. And we could choose what to do with the stories we encounter. Will it be "Let my people be your people," or will it be "Call me Mara"?
On a slightly related note...
I've been following Abby's updates on Facebook about the happenings in Colombia, both what she's doing there and the political situation. And from time to time, I've found myself wondering if what I'm doing here matters because it seems to pale in comparison to that. But I've had to remind myself that we are both gifted differently. I'm not sure how I would be able to function emotionally if I was living in Bogota. But at the same time, I thrive on randomness and creativity - and stories. Not that one is better than the other, but I think that's why there's so many of us, so that each of us can be really good at a few small things.
World Cup Fever!
And so the World Cup Fever is in full swing now. How do I know this? Just look at the amount of trash-talking on your Facebook mini-feeds. Or...
... When Deutschland won their first game against Australia on Sunday, car horns were going off and there was random cheering and yelling on the streets of Berlin.
... German flags are hanging just about everywhere. And I'm pretty sure there isn't a national German holiday around the corner.
... Speaking of flags, there are a bunch of other flags being flown. The cafe downstairs has several Spanish flags, one Brazilian and... I don't remember the last one, but I think it might be Argentina.
... Hey, speaking of Argentina, we're flying one for Mely too!
... And also, I'm sunburnt from cheering on a very impressive Chilean team at an outdoor venue with some new friends from Chile and Mexico!
Viva la World Cup!
OH! And our team is now on Facebook (but we're just starting out, so bear with us). Find us (xzberlin) and "Like" us!
Hey you folks in warmer climates than Berlin or South Africa, stay cool.
Love you all.
This past week, I feel like I've been invited into so many life stories. Let me tell you a few of these stories. But for privacy reasons, I've changed some of these names.
Ruth
I met Ruth one evening at Mr. Minsch, the cafe across the street from where we live. If you're ever in Kreuzberg, you need to have someone take you to Mr. Minsch. They have the best cakes we've ever tasted.
Anyway, so Ruth. She lives just below Aaron and her name had come up in several conversations previously, so of course I was intrigued. As she sat down and talked to us, there was something about the way she expressed herself that made me want to sit with her for hours. Then I realised what it was. Her quiet but intense passion for life.
I'm not sure I can find the right words to describe her, but here's my feeble attempt. If I had to explain what a hippie is, Ruth would be the personification of it. Or if there's someone who speaks Na'vi ("I see you" - yes Kelley, there's another Avatar reference for you), it would be Ruth. Ruth is someone who knew just about everyone by name. Oh, and not only by name, she could probably tell you a couple stories of their lives too. She's like a free bird, almost a drifter (she was passing by Mr. Minsch while on her bike and stopped to chat with us for about an hour). But at the same time, she's also so very grounded in reality and in touch with her community.
And then she talks about an experience she had some years back when she was really ill and described an encounter that was almost spiritual. I'm not quite sure where she lands where spirituality is concerned, but what really drew me to her was just her genuine desire to love those around her.
Tonight, she stopped by to give us some information about her dentist because my tooth has been really bothering me for about a week now. And she also shared her home remedy of simply sucking on a clove because it helps soothe the pain. I'm not sure if it was the clove or the Ibuprofin, but my tooth hasn't bothered me in awhile.
That, to me, is "one anothering."
Justin
The day after I met Ruth the first time, Rhonda and I went to another cafe at a different part of town. That's where we met Justin. I remembered seeing him with his girlfriend the last time we were at the cafe, and he was helping Amy and I explain some German grammar rules to Suzann.
That day, in really good English, Justin told us of how he learnt English when he met a guy from Scotland while he was in prison. At a young age, his parents gave him away and he ended up in the company of drug-dealers. One thing led to another and he found himself in Berlin where he lost a childhood friend in a shooting. That was when he decided to stay in Berlin.
He told us he was starting to try to figure out how to get cleaned up. He didn't like how the drugs have messed him up since a young age that now there are moments where he just can't think straight. The guy could probably have been a brilliant linguist if not for the drug use, but... Could anyone blame him?
The same time I was listening to his story, I was reminded of a similar story I had heard as a child - one that my pastor in Singapore told often: his own life story. Funny how stories connect people, huh? It was like I heard this voice in my head saying, "His story isn't over yet." I only wish I could stick around to see the rest of it unfold.
Gretchen
Now Gretchen was just a fun lady. Rhonda had left the cafe with one of the women we met there for a few minutes and I got to chat with Gretchen. She seemed to just be excited to be able to practise her English, so she told me some of the stories she knew about the regulars at the cafe.
In one corner, there was a lady who would from time to time play with her shoes, then put on one side of a rubber glove and wave her hands around as if she had nail polish on her fingers. Gretchen told me she heard that this lady had been really beautiful when she was young. But the time in a concentration camp during the Second World War really messed her up, so now she spends her days walking around the block several times, and stopping in at the cafe once in a while to take a shower.
After all we had talked about the history of Germany, hearing this story just made reality sink in a bit more. And I'm left with the question again of, now what?
Naomi
Aaron and I made a 24-hour trip to Hannover to spend some time with Sieg, Sanna and Amy Froese. I didn't physically meet Naomi there, but I encountered her story which reminded me of how all these stories all get woven together at some point.
I've never had a child of my own, so I can't say I understand what it's like to lose a child. But I have lost a very dear friend, and had the privilege of entering into her parents' journey of learning what it means to lose a child. I can't say I can or will be able to relate to Sieg and Sanna's loss of their daughter Naomi. But the night that I spent sleeping on Naomi's bed made me thankful that Sanna was willing to let me in to that part of their story even in a small way like that. And it made me think of Francisco and Martita, and of course, Keren.
And these stories all came full-circle when I stumbled upon a little duck display thing in the Froeses' bathroom that said "My name is Ruth." Funny how this all started with Ruth and ended with Naomi huh. For me, it was a reminder that these are the stories of life. And we could choose what to do with the stories we encounter. Will it be "Let my people be your people," or will it be "Call me Mara"?
On a slightly related note...
I've been following Abby's updates on Facebook about the happenings in Colombia, both what she's doing there and the political situation. And from time to time, I've found myself wondering if what I'm doing here matters because it seems to pale in comparison to that. But I've had to remind myself that we are both gifted differently. I'm not sure how I would be able to function emotionally if I was living in Bogota. But at the same time, I thrive on randomness and creativity - and stories. Not that one is better than the other, but I think that's why there's so many of us, so that each of us can be really good at a few small things.
World Cup Fever!
And so the World Cup Fever is in full swing now. How do I know this? Just look at the amount of trash-talking on your Facebook mini-feeds. Or...
... When Deutschland won their first game against Australia on Sunday, car horns were going off and there was random cheering and yelling on the streets of Berlin.
... German flags are hanging just about everywhere. And I'm pretty sure there isn't a national German holiday around the corner.
... Speaking of flags, there are a bunch of other flags being flown. The cafe downstairs has several Spanish flags, one Brazilian and... I don't remember the last one, but I think it might be Argentina.
... Hey, speaking of Argentina, we're flying one for Mely too!
... And also, I'm sunburnt from cheering on a very impressive Chilean team at an outdoor venue with some new friends from Chile and Mexico!
Viva la World Cup!
OH! And our team is now on Facebook (but we're just starting out, so bear with us). Find us (xzberlin) and "Like" us!
Hey you folks in warmer climates than Berlin or South Africa, stay cool.
Love you all.
10 June 2010
Something Unpredictable...
Alright, tonight's theme is unpredictability I guess. Or the little things that you find yourself stumbling into. Or maybe I just have the Green Day song stuck in my head...
It's Allergy Season...
There are some things that you learn when crossing culture that you never really expect to. Like when I first moved to the US, I had to learn what "hard water" was. In Singapore, all water that flowed through the faucets tasted the same because they came from the same source: the water treatment plant.
Or like allergies. I never knew that when the seasons change, depending on how your respiratory system is built, you could get really sick or irritated by the pollination. In Singapore, we basically only have two season: hot and wet, and hotter and wetter. Pollination? Who's ever heard of that?
This week, my allergies have been hateful. It might been that I've been outside for too long, but my nose definitely has not been happy. Nor have my eyes for that matter. Last night, I slept for about twelve hours straight. "Spring" has come really late in Berlin this year, according to Rhonda. And I'm not sure how I feel about that yet.
Office Work...
In other news, this week has involved a lot of office work and brain juice. Not that being with people doesn't require brain juice, but office work has been intensive. And once again, too much coffee has been consumed (hence tonight's late night activity). We've had a few things to work aound here. Evaluated the two-and-a-half weeks of the Urban Ministry class. Officially got my intern contract with the team here somewhat complete today. And... The website for the team.
If your organization or team has a website that is user-friendly, succinctly describes who you are and what you do, loads quickly and efficiently, will you PLEASE send us the contact information for whoever your creative team is? As Aaron would say, "Good goo!" This website business is a pain in the you-know-where.
I haven't quite decided yet if it's a blessing or a curse to be working with two people who function very differently from me. I guess seeing as this is the first time I have to work this closely in a team like that, it's always an interesting process. It's great that Kelley has the big picture and a far better understanding of what language to use to communicate with our audience (and I'm not just talking about English oder Deutsch here, although those can produce interesting problems we have to work through). And Aaron has the business plan arena down. Then there's me and my artsy-fartsy-ness. Together we should technically make a great team, but we need to speak the same language first, and also understand how each of the others work best.
It's an interesting process - really frustrating at times, but so much to learn and so much room for me to grow.
Hey, once the website is up and running, we'll let you know.
Praises...
Everytime I think about this opportunity I've had to work with this team, I count it as a blessing about five or six times over. Could there be a better match for me to do my internship? I don't know, but the Planner of these things will have to get REALLY creative.
AND the weather here has been amazing the last few days. No, really. Sunshine and 70s-80s deg F or about 20s deg C. Yes, please.
And (I already mentioned this in a previous entry, but still...) Yay for new friends and good food! Sushi, and people who speak all these different languages but yet still trying to find some way to communicate with one another? Yes, please.
So much to be thankful for. If you want all the specifics, you'll have to buy me dinner or coffee when I get back :)
Prayer Requests...
One of our team members, Mely, hurt her back on Saturday when we were out on our excursion. Doctor's put her on 3 weeks bed-rest so she can't even lift Emilia (her one-year-old) now. Adrian has dropped Emilia off here the last two days so Rhonda and I could watch her, but Mely's mum came in tonight to help out for a bit.
And also, just got news that the wife of the national leader of the Church of God in one of the Asian countries is not doing so well because her cancer has returned. Between the missionaries and the national leaders, the region has been stricken with cancer four times over - one of whom we lost in January. Also, their son and daughter-in-law will be arriving in Anderson in a couple weeks to start their Masters programs this fall. I hate not being there to give them a proper welcome, but pray for their period of adjustment.
And finally, little Kaleigh Lee will be coming into the world anytime now! My cousin's having her first baby - also first baby from our generation!
I guess that's all, kids. Hey, 39.5 hours till the first World Cup game where Mexico plays South Africa. Which teams are YOU cheering for, and which teams deserve to be trash-talked to/about?
Love you all.
It's Allergy Season...
There are some things that you learn when crossing culture that you never really expect to. Like when I first moved to the US, I had to learn what "hard water" was. In Singapore, all water that flowed through the faucets tasted the same because they came from the same source: the water treatment plant.
Or like allergies. I never knew that when the seasons change, depending on how your respiratory system is built, you could get really sick or irritated by the pollination. In Singapore, we basically only have two season: hot and wet, and hotter and wetter. Pollination? Who's ever heard of that?
This week, my allergies have been hateful. It might been that I've been outside for too long, but my nose definitely has not been happy. Nor have my eyes for that matter. Last night, I slept for about twelve hours straight. "Spring" has come really late in Berlin this year, according to Rhonda. And I'm not sure how I feel about that yet.
Office Work...
In other news, this week has involved a lot of office work and brain juice. Not that being with people doesn't require brain juice, but office work has been intensive. And once again, too much coffee has been consumed (hence tonight's late night activity). We've had a few things to work aound here. Evaluated the two-and-a-half weeks of the Urban Ministry class. Officially got my intern contract with the team here somewhat complete today. And... The website for the team.
If your organization or team has a website that is user-friendly, succinctly describes who you are and what you do, loads quickly and efficiently, will you PLEASE send us the contact information for whoever your creative team is? As Aaron would say, "Good goo!" This website business is a pain in the you-know-where.
I haven't quite decided yet if it's a blessing or a curse to be working with two people who function very differently from me. I guess seeing as this is the first time I have to work this closely in a team like that, it's always an interesting process. It's great that Kelley has the big picture and a far better understanding of what language to use to communicate with our audience (and I'm not just talking about English oder Deutsch here, although those can produce interesting problems we have to work through). And Aaron has the business plan arena down. Then there's me and my artsy-fartsy-ness. Together we should technically make a great team, but we need to speak the same language first, and also understand how each of the others work best.
It's an interesting process - really frustrating at times, but so much to learn and so much room for me to grow.
Hey, once the website is up and running, we'll let you know.
Praises...
Everytime I think about this opportunity I've had to work with this team, I count it as a blessing about five or six times over. Could there be a better match for me to do my internship? I don't know, but the Planner of these things will have to get REALLY creative.
AND the weather here has been amazing the last few days. No, really. Sunshine and 70s-80s deg F or about 20s deg C. Yes, please.
And (I already mentioned this in a previous entry, but still...) Yay for new friends and good food! Sushi, and people who speak all these different languages but yet still trying to find some way to communicate with one another? Yes, please.
So much to be thankful for. If you want all the specifics, you'll have to buy me dinner or coffee when I get back :)
Prayer Requests...
One of our team members, Mely, hurt her back on Saturday when we were out on our excursion. Doctor's put her on 3 weeks bed-rest so she can't even lift Emilia (her one-year-old) now. Adrian has dropped Emilia off here the last two days so Rhonda and I could watch her, but Mely's mum came in tonight to help out for a bit.
And also, just got news that the wife of the national leader of the Church of God in one of the Asian countries is not doing so well because her cancer has returned. Between the missionaries and the national leaders, the region has been stricken with cancer four times over - one of whom we lost in January. Also, their son and daughter-in-law will be arriving in Anderson in a couple weeks to start their Masters programs this fall. I hate not being there to give them a proper welcome, but pray for their period of adjustment.
And finally, little Kaleigh Lee will be coming into the world anytime now! My cousin's having her first baby - also first baby from our generation!
I guess that's all, kids. Hey, 39.5 hours till the first World Cup game where Mexico plays South Africa. Which teams are YOU cheering for, and which teams deserve to be trash-talked to/about?
Love you all.
07 June 2010
Poop-flinging Monkeys
The title of this post is homage to Kelley and Aaron for all the randomness they've added to my life in the last month or so. For the full story, you'll have to ask me about it.
Sushi Party
Friday night was the sushi party. Other than the crashes that the international students at AU used to do, I don't think I've been to a house party as international as this. There were probably about 20 of us that night, but between us, we had Spanish-, Japanese-, English-, German-, French- and Mandarin-speakers.
A few of my favourite moments that evening:
1) When Mariko stepped in and started demonstrating and explaining how it's done. Let's be honest, I've done sushi parties in Singapore before, but they always end up messy but fun anyway. I was a little nervous about the whole party, so it was a big relief when Mariko decided to just step in. Come to find out later, it's actually unlike Mariko to step in to the center of a party like that. Well, it was a good thing regardless!
3) Christian's fantastic work of art. Yes, in that picture above, that's his own masterpiece. He doesn't like being in front of the camera though, hence the evil eye that he always gives me.
Excursion
Saturday morning, we loaded up the picnic baskets and headed to... somewhere. I have no idea where we ended up mostly because I just followed the group around after we got on the S-bahn. The sun was out and I think that was the highlight. Unfortunately, that also meant the sunbathers were out. If I had forgotten for a moment that I was in Europe, the sunbathers definitely let me know.
On the way back from our picnic, we encountered an interesting group of people. Speaking of the subcultures of Berlin, this group was definitely an interesting subculture. Bikes, mohawks in all colours, and bags and bags of alcohol... I'm not even sure which group they would belong to, but if you've seen Step Up 2, with the group of dancers "punk"-ing the train stations, that's what that group reminded me of. It was fascinating just to watch the people react as they got on the train. One lady turned the stroller her baby was in around so she her baby wasn't facing them. On the other hand, there was the one guy who offered a bottle to another. I couldn't figure out if the other guy was part of the group, but guy #1 who offered the bottle asked if he needed help opening the bottle. And guy #2 said no, he had a bottle opener that he wore on his thumb.
But that got me thinking. What if we "one-another"ed like that more in our Christ communities? How many more people will we draw?
What gave me hope that day though, was after the lady with the stroller left, Ralf come over and sit where she had been sitting. Not only was Samira's stroller facing them, Ralf also leaned over to make small talk with guy #1 who had offered the beer.
These are the people I get to work alongside. Blessing #652? Yes, please.
Ok, that's all I'm writing for now. My brain is exhausted. I don't know if you can tell from just reading these entries, but I'm REALLY enjoying every moment of this. And I'm trying to take it all in and not start thinking about how little time I actually have here.
Oh, and here's what the weather's been like this weekend:
Sushi Party
1) When Mariko stepped in and started demonstrating and explaining how it's done. Let's be honest, I've done sushi parties in Singapore before, but they always end up messy but fun anyway. I was a little nervous about the whole party, so it was a big relief when Mariko decided to just step in. Come to find out later, it's actually unlike Mariko to step in to the center of a party like that. Well, it was a good thing regardless!
2) Jie Qiong and Rocio - new friends from China and Chile. At one point during the night, the three of us were talking, but there was no common language that the three of us completely understood. Jie Qiong had a little bit of English, so she understood what Rocio and I were saying to each other but she couldn't say much. I understood that little bit of Deutsch so when Rocio and Jie Qiong were talking, I couldn't say much either. And I got to practise my really rusty Mandarin with Jie Qiong. Come to find out she doesn't go out much because she doesn't speak much of the language. So we're going to hang out some while I'm here!
3) Christian's fantastic work of art. Yes, in that picture above, that's his own masterpiece. He doesn't like being in front of the camera though, hence the evil eye that he always gives me.
Excursion
On the way back from our picnic, we encountered an interesting group of people. Speaking of the subcultures of Berlin, this group was definitely an interesting subculture. Bikes, mohawks in all colours, and bags and bags of alcohol... I'm not even sure which group they would belong to, but if you've seen Step Up 2, with the group of dancers "punk"-ing the train stations, that's what that group reminded me of. It was fascinating just to watch the people react as they got on the train. One lady turned the stroller her baby was in around so she her baby wasn't facing them. On the other hand, there was the one guy who offered a bottle to another. I couldn't figure out if the other guy was part of the group, but guy #1 who offered the bottle asked if he needed help opening the bottle. And guy #2 said no, he had a bottle opener that he wore on his thumb.
But that got me thinking. What if we "one-another"ed like that more in our Christ communities? How many more people will we draw?
What gave me hope that day though, was after the lady with the stroller left, Ralf come over and sit where she had been sitting. Not only was Samira's stroller facing them, Ralf also leaned over to make small talk with guy #1 who had offered the beer.
These are the people I get to work alongside. Blessing #652? Yes, please.
Ok, that's all I'm writing for now. My brain is exhausted. I don't know if you can tell from just reading these entries, but I'm REALLY enjoying every moment of this. And I'm trying to take it all in and not start thinking about how little time I actually have here.
Oh, and here's what the weather's been like this weekend:
And today's entry was brought to you by:
Kelley, Aaron and the poop-flinging monkeys.
Love you all.
03 June 2010
Life Since Urban Ministry Class...
So it's been almost a week since the group left after our Urban Ministry class ended. I guess it's time for me to start writing a little more frequently, huh? Most of this past week has just been living here and having more conversations about the team's strategic involvement in the life of the community of Kreuzberg where we live. Alright, I'm running ahead of myself.
Teenfreizeit Mitarbeiters Treffen (Teen Camp Staff Meeting)
There's a lot that we talk about in our ministry classes that we never fully understand until we've had the hands-on experience. Flexibility is one of those things.
Friday night, we were expecting a group of nine to come in for dinner. Everything had been set up for Abendbrot (Evening bread - that's cold-cut sandwiches. This is the German evening meal.) and at least Aaron and I were starving. But we had been waiting for the group to get here before we started eating. So when we found out that two of the nine weren't coming because they weren't feeling too good and the rest had been held up by transportation issues, we went ahead and started eating. Which might have been a good thing because the group of seven didn't get in till around 10 p.m. I felt bad for them because they were probably starving by then. And I'll have to admit that I was really relieved to not have to deal with an overdose of German that night. I really wanted to hang out with the group for a bit when they finally got in, but my head was throbbing, so it was Ibuprofen and bedtime.
Saturday was the killer. I was up early to help Rhonda get things set up for breakfast, so by the time the official day was over, I was completely wiped out. After breakfast, we cleaned up a little and got started with our meeting. If having to pay full attention and not doodle at all is difficult, trying to pay attention to someone whom you can probably only understand half of the words they're saying at most is a real pain. From time to time, as Kelley or Rhonda remembered, they would translate what was being said. My limited German vocab helped some, but that just took too much brain power. By the time the morning session was over, I was ready for a nap.
But the fact that it was sunny that day and we got to take a nice walk out to the park and had a grill party helped some. On the walk to the park, Cymin and I accidentally got split up from the rest of the group. Her pushing Zamira along slowed us down a little so we ended up behind the rest of the group (which was kinda funny because we ended up getting there before everyone else did anyway). Aaron speaks often of the importance of finding that commonality in our stories because these are the things that bring people together. Well Cymin's "salvation story" is very similar to my mum's, so we got to chatting about that. And I think the fact that we're both the artsy, musicion type also created a strange bond. In the language of the Na'vi (yes, Kelley, you're allowed to be proud that I'm speaking Avatar language), we "saw" each other.
There was something really unique that I noticed at the grill party. When we got there, Kelley and Adrian had already kind of set up the grill. The other guys headed toward the open space and started throwing a frisbee around. My natural inclination was to join them, until about fifteen minutes in, I realised 1) I wasn't really included unless the frisbee accidentally landed close to where I was, and 2) the other girls were all sitting down at our picnic area, either playing with babies or just trying to stay cool. I'm not a strong advocate against gender stereotypes or anything like that, but it was just an interesting thing to observe. Someone had once mentioned that the whole woman in ministry thing is still slightly controversial in the Church of God in Germany, so I kind of wonder if that had anything to do with it.
After we were done eating, Tillmann, the equivalent of the director of youth ministries of the Church of God in Germany gathered us together for our next session. This time, I said something to Tekle and Raffi about needing a translator, so between Kelley, Rhonda and the two of them, the translating was covered. It was just really frustrating to be that dependent on someone else even for something as simple as conversation. And it made me feel really powerless and discouraged. The question that kept going over and over in my head was, "What kind of a missionary are you going to be if you even need for the people you're living amongst to speak the language that you speak, rather than you actually learning their language and learning it well?" I think that discouragement, more than anything else, was what really wore me out that weekend.
After Abendbrot that evening, the group went out to one of the local hangouts to chill for a bit. I really wanted to go with them because I'd been feeling like I was really anti-social for not trying hard enough to talk to them and for constantly being so tired that weekend. I knew it wasn't completely my fault that I was that tired since my entire time in Berlin prior to their arrival had just been exhausting. But in some ways, I felt like I was being a terrible host even though it wasn't really my party either. So instead of going out with them, Christian and I stayed home with Kelley, Rhonda and the babies. And Christian and I watched Germany whoop Hungary in their friendly match that night. I'm really not a fan of German soccer, but there's something about cheering on the national team of the place you're living in because the people you're living with do actually care about their team. It's kind of like the same reason why I'm a Colts fan. Of course, the fact that they're a really good team helps - true also of the German national team. Hey, when in Rome... Right?
Sunday morning flew by fairly quickly. Ralf led Communion after breakfast and we went around the table, sharing about how we were doing and stuff like that - mostly just so we know where everyone is with life. We didn't really know each other very well then, but yet we were comfortable enough at that point to be honest about where we were in life. That was really refreshing for me.
Before long, the group was packing up and leaving. It was a little sad for me because I was just starting to connect with some of them. And the fact that I'm only going to be at Teenfreizeit for half the time because I'll be leaving to head back to the US right about the middle of it didn't really help. But... Well, such is my world now, I guess. Helps to be reminded from time to time it's not about what I miss out on when I leave, but what I get to be a part of where I'm going to. (Thank you to one of the wise voices in my life for that conversation last night).
After they left, Rhonda and I cleaned up some, started laundry then crashed for naps. We were all really exhausted from three long weeks and Kelley wasn't feeling too good the day before. But the way they both push through all their struggles to be hospitable to groups coming in is something I really admire.
Monday was kind of a lazy day. We talked about my budget and took care of some of the official business stuff in the morning. The rest of the day kind of just drifted by and in the evening, we headed over to Ralf and Cymin's for cheesecake and coffee. It was a nice day to just spend a bit of time with the same people, except there was no real business to take care of this time. It was just fun.
On the language issues...
So, backtrekking a bit. By the end of the weekend, I was exhausted and kind of frustrated and discouraged by the whole language barrier thing. Yes, most of the people at the Teenfreizeit meeting spoke enough English for me to communicate with them. But I was still really discouraged and almost felt like my being in Berlin was not going to bring much fruit in anyway. I guess God has this thing where he lets me sit in the box I put him and myself and for a while before poking me on the side and saying, "Hey lookie here - I was doing this while you were sitting in there trying to find me. Wanna join me over here where it's more fun?"
Kelley, Rhonda, Aaron and I went to look for the Asian store that Ralf told us about. We're doing a sushi party this Friday so we went to get some of the ingredients yesterday. Sure, the place is supposedly an Asian store, but I think we often forget that there are so many different definitions of Asian (like McDonald's version is sadly limited to sweet Thai chili sauce and mandarin oranges - which are not limited to Asia, it's just the mandarin makes people thing it's Asian. But that's just me talking - sorry, shutting up now). I didn't want to assume to guy running the place was Chinese even though everything about the store decor seemed to point toward that. So when I finally heard him speaking Mandarin to one of the other ladies in the store, I knew it was safe then.
As Kelley was checking out, I stood by the register, trying to think of something appropriate to say that wouldn't sound like I'm just blatantly saying, "Hey, I heard you talking - you speak Mandarin, we should talk." And mostly praying. Finally when he got done and we were heading out, I looked the guy in the eye and said, "Xie xie" (Thank you). Immediately you could see his whole face lighting up. "Ni shi Zhong Guo lai de ma?" (Are you from China?) So I explained I was from Singapore but my grandparents came from Guang Dong province. We made a bit more small talk, and finally as I was heading out, it was like there was this voice saying, "See now why you're here?"
The Turkish Market
This morning I took a little advenutre. Rhonda gave me directions to the Turkish market, so shortly after breakfast, I headed out to roam the streets of Berlin by myself.
How do I adequately describe the Turkish market? To the Singaporean audience reading this, think a cross between the wet market and a pasar malam. I got off the bus and headed in the general direction Rhonda told me to, and before long, the smells greeted me. As gross as the wet markets in Singapore smells, it is one of my favourite scents that I sometimes get homesick for. The smell of fish and other produce, vegetables and spices all mixed in together reminds me of the times when I would go marketing with Mum as a kid. Yes, I get melancholic about the strangest things, but we already covered that I'm weird, so you can throw that into the mix.
But other than the groceries, you also find the little knick-knacks, beads and sewing material, jewelry, scarves, clothes for people of all ages, shapes and sizes. It's just a fun place to walk up and down, and would be a great place to people-watch. And also, since my little moment of epiphany yesterday, I've also started paying more attention to the people around me. Not so much to single out the Mandarin-speakers so I can connect with them like that, but more to be curious about the stories of the people I meet in general. And not just mere curiosity, but actually striking up conversations with them.
Oh, just a few more on language...
So after the Turkish market, I stopped in at one of the little ecclectic stores on the street we live on. The lady running the shop said a few things to me in German, most of which I understood. Since I was in a shop, I had mentally pulled out the flashcards sorted under "vocab for shopping". So when she pulled a "Woher kommen Sie?" (Where are you from?) I did a double-take. I didn't pull the flashcards sorted under "vocab for introductions" quickly enough so that the blank look on my face would go away, so right away she switched to English. So we had a chat about how she could tell I understood what she was saying but I didn't know how to respond. And between my limited German and her limited English, I explained where I was from and I was studying in the US but I was in Berlin for my internship. Our conversation ended with her saying, "Have fun learning German!"
Just when I thought language was going to be a big barrier...
And because I can't communicate much, I'm also re-learning the power of prayer.
Looking Ahead...
And so here's kind of what the rest of my stay here will look like, at least as far as I know now.
Thursday, June 3: Errands with Philips + Aaron, Lunch at the Rathaus (cultural experience, according to Kelley and Aaron), back to the Asian store to get extra stuff for the sushi party and to hopefully have more conversation with the guy there.
Friday, June 4: Sushi party. Rhonda is inviting her Japanese friends, Aaron's going to try to invite some friends from language school, I think Mely is inviting her neighbour whose brother is working in China but is here to visit. And we're also going to try to invite the guy running the Asian store.
Saturday, June 5: S-Bahn excursion. Ralf has a book that tells where some of the more interesting S-Bahn (trains) stations are. We're going to check a few of those out, and they all have some friends they're hoping to invite.
Sunday, June 6: Grill party at the Havlicks. The Havlicks used to be neighbours with the Philips before they moved to Kreuzberg and the Havlicks to their new place. Even though they don't live in the same neighbourhood anymore, the relationship is still there, and Simone is one of the Mitarbeiters at Teenfreizeit. Their 12-year-old daughter, Renee is a sweetheart, and someone I'd really like to connect with.
Wednesday, June 9: Team meeting
Friday, June 11: World Cup kick off! Aaron and I, and probably Ralf and Adrian are going to watch the Mexico vs. S. Africa game somewhere.
Saturday, June 12: Quick visit to Hannover to hang out with Sieg and Amy.
Sunday, June 13: Church service at Sieg's church, Pre-game grill party, Germany plays at 20:30.
Sunday, June 20: Spanisch party with Mely's and Aaron's friends before Aaron leaves for the US
Tuesday, June 22: Aaron and Kelley leave for the US
Saturday, June 26: Rhonda and Christian leave for the US, possible visit to an old friend.
Friday, July 2: To Fritzlar
Wednesday, July 7: Return from Fritzlar
Friday, July 9: Nachtigalls arrive in Berlin
Sunday, July 11: Welcome dinner for the Nachtigalls
Wednesday, July 14: Philips' return from the US
Monday, July 19: Teenfreizeit prep days
Thursday, July 22: Teenfreizeit
Tuesday, July 27: Return to Berlin
Wednesday, July 28: Return to the US
Alright, I think that's all I have for tonight. I apologise that this is kind of a long one. I'll try to write more frequently so that they will be shorter blurbs rather than a long one like this.
Love you all, and thank you for your prayers, Facebook messages and e-mails. I'm trying to be better at writing back. Really, I am.
Teenfreizeit Mitarbeiters Treffen (Teen Camp Staff Meeting)
There's a lot that we talk about in our ministry classes that we never fully understand until we've had the hands-on experience. Flexibility is one of those things.
Friday night, we were expecting a group of nine to come in for dinner. Everything had been set up for Abendbrot (Evening bread - that's cold-cut sandwiches. This is the German evening meal.) and at least Aaron and I were starving. But we had been waiting for the group to get here before we started eating. So when we found out that two of the nine weren't coming because they weren't feeling too good and the rest had been held up by transportation issues, we went ahead and started eating. Which might have been a good thing because the group of seven didn't get in till around 10 p.m. I felt bad for them because they were probably starving by then. And I'll have to admit that I was really relieved to not have to deal with an overdose of German that night. I really wanted to hang out with the group for a bit when they finally got in, but my head was throbbing, so it was Ibuprofen and bedtime.
Saturday was the killer. I was up early to help Rhonda get things set up for breakfast, so by the time the official day was over, I was completely wiped out. After breakfast, we cleaned up a little and got started with our meeting. If having to pay full attention and not doodle at all is difficult, trying to pay attention to someone whom you can probably only understand half of the words they're saying at most is a real pain. From time to time, as Kelley or Rhonda remembered, they would translate what was being said. My limited German vocab helped some, but that just took too much brain power. By the time the morning session was over, I was ready for a nap.
But the fact that it was sunny that day and we got to take a nice walk out to the park and had a grill party helped some. On the walk to the park, Cymin and I accidentally got split up from the rest of the group. Her pushing Zamira along slowed us down a little so we ended up behind the rest of the group (which was kinda funny because we ended up getting there before everyone else did anyway). Aaron speaks often of the importance of finding that commonality in our stories because these are the things that bring people together. Well Cymin's "salvation story" is very similar to my mum's, so we got to chatting about that. And I think the fact that we're both the artsy, musicion type also created a strange bond. In the language of the Na'vi (yes, Kelley, you're allowed to be proud that I'm speaking Avatar language), we "saw" each other.
There was something really unique that I noticed at the grill party. When we got there, Kelley and Adrian had already kind of set up the grill. The other guys headed toward the open space and started throwing a frisbee around. My natural inclination was to join them, until about fifteen minutes in, I realised 1) I wasn't really included unless the frisbee accidentally landed close to where I was, and 2) the other girls were all sitting down at our picnic area, either playing with babies or just trying to stay cool. I'm not a strong advocate against gender stereotypes or anything like that, but it was just an interesting thing to observe. Someone had once mentioned that the whole woman in ministry thing is still slightly controversial in the Church of God in Germany, so I kind of wonder if that had anything to do with it.
After we were done eating, Tillmann, the equivalent of the director of youth ministries of the Church of God in Germany gathered us together for our next session. This time, I said something to Tekle and Raffi about needing a translator, so between Kelley, Rhonda and the two of them, the translating was covered. It was just really frustrating to be that dependent on someone else even for something as simple as conversation. And it made me feel really powerless and discouraged. The question that kept going over and over in my head was, "What kind of a missionary are you going to be if you even need for the people you're living amongst to speak the language that you speak, rather than you actually learning their language and learning it well?" I think that discouragement, more than anything else, was what really wore me out that weekend.
After Abendbrot that evening, the group went out to one of the local hangouts to chill for a bit. I really wanted to go with them because I'd been feeling like I was really anti-social for not trying hard enough to talk to them and for constantly being so tired that weekend. I knew it wasn't completely my fault that I was that tired since my entire time in Berlin prior to their arrival had just been exhausting. But in some ways, I felt like I was being a terrible host even though it wasn't really my party either. So instead of going out with them, Christian and I stayed home with Kelley, Rhonda and the babies. And Christian and I watched Germany whoop Hungary in their friendly match that night. I'm really not a fan of German soccer, but there's something about cheering on the national team of the place you're living in because the people you're living with do actually care about their team. It's kind of like the same reason why I'm a Colts fan. Of course, the fact that they're a really good team helps - true also of the German national team. Hey, when in Rome... Right?
Sunday morning flew by fairly quickly. Ralf led Communion after breakfast and we went around the table, sharing about how we were doing and stuff like that - mostly just so we know where everyone is with life. We didn't really know each other very well then, but yet we were comfortable enough at that point to be honest about where we were in life. That was really refreshing for me.
Before long, the group was packing up and leaving. It was a little sad for me because I was just starting to connect with some of them. And the fact that I'm only going to be at Teenfreizeit for half the time because I'll be leaving to head back to the US right about the middle of it didn't really help. But... Well, such is my world now, I guess. Helps to be reminded from time to time it's not about what I miss out on when I leave, but what I get to be a part of where I'm going to. (Thank you to one of the wise voices in my life for that conversation last night).
After they left, Rhonda and I cleaned up some, started laundry then crashed for naps. We were all really exhausted from three long weeks and Kelley wasn't feeling too good the day before. But the way they both push through all their struggles to be hospitable to groups coming in is something I really admire.
Monday was kind of a lazy day. We talked about my budget and took care of some of the official business stuff in the morning. The rest of the day kind of just drifted by and in the evening, we headed over to Ralf and Cymin's for cheesecake and coffee. It was a nice day to just spend a bit of time with the same people, except there was no real business to take care of this time. It was just fun.
On the language issues...
So, backtrekking a bit. By the end of the weekend, I was exhausted and kind of frustrated and discouraged by the whole language barrier thing. Yes, most of the people at the Teenfreizeit meeting spoke enough English for me to communicate with them. But I was still really discouraged and almost felt like my being in Berlin was not going to bring much fruit in anyway. I guess God has this thing where he lets me sit in the box I put him and myself and for a while before poking me on the side and saying, "Hey lookie here - I was doing this while you were sitting in there trying to find me. Wanna join me over here where it's more fun?"
Kelley, Rhonda, Aaron and I went to look for the Asian store that Ralf told us about. We're doing a sushi party this Friday so we went to get some of the ingredients yesterday. Sure, the place is supposedly an Asian store, but I think we often forget that there are so many different definitions of Asian (like McDonald's version is sadly limited to sweet Thai chili sauce and mandarin oranges - which are not limited to Asia, it's just the mandarin makes people thing it's Asian. But that's just me talking - sorry, shutting up now). I didn't want to assume to guy running the place was Chinese even though everything about the store decor seemed to point toward that. So when I finally heard him speaking Mandarin to one of the other ladies in the store, I knew it was safe then.
As Kelley was checking out, I stood by the register, trying to think of something appropriate to say that wouldn't sound like I'm just blatantly saying, "Hey, I heard you talking - you speak Mandarin, we should talk." And mostly praying. Finally when he got done and we were heading out, I looked the guy in the eye and said, "Xie xie" (Thank you). Immediately you could see his whole face lighting up. "Ni shi Zhong Guo lai de ma?" (Are you from China?) So I explained I was from Singapore but my grandparents came from Guang Dong province. We made a bit more small talk, and finally as I was heading out, it was like there was this voice saying, "See now why you're here?"
The Turkish Market
This morning I took a little advenutre. Rhonda gave me directions to the Turkish market, so shortly after breakfast, I headed out to roam the streets of Berlin by myself.
How do I adequately describe the Turkish market? To the Singaporean audience reading this, think a cross between the wet market and a pasar malam. I got off the bus and headed in the general direction Rhonda told me to, and before long, the smells greeted me. As gross as the wet markets in Singapore smells, it is one of my favourite scents that I sometimes get homesick for. The smell of fish and other produce, vegetables and spices all mixed in together reminds me of the times when I would go marketing with Mum as a kid. Yes, I get melancholic about the strangest things, but we already covered that I'm weird, so you can throw that into the mix.
But other than the groceries, you also find the little knick-knacks, beads and sewing material, jewelry, scarves, clothes for people of all ages, shapes and sizes. It's just a fun place to walk up and down, and would be a great place to people-watch. And also, since my little moment of epiphany yesterday, I've also started paying more attention to the people around me. Not so much to single out the Mandarin-speakers so I can connect with them like that, but more to be curious about the stories of the people I meet in general. And not just mere curiosity, but actually striking up conversations with them.
Oh, just a few more on language...
So after the Turkish market, I stopped in at one of the little ecclectic stores on the street we live on. The lady running the shop said a few things to me in German, most of which I understood. Since I was in a shop, I had mentally pulled out the flashcards sorted under "vocab for shopping". So when she pulled a "Woher kommen Sie?" (Where are you from?) I did a double-take. I didn't pull the flashcards sorted under "vocab for introductions" quickly enough so that the blank look on my face would go away, so right away she switched to English. So we had a chat about how she could tell I understood what she was saying but I didn't know how to respond. And between my limited German and her limited English, I explained where I was from and I was studying in the US but I was in Berlin for my internship. Our conversation ended with her saying, "Have fun learning German!"
Just when I thought language was going to be a big barrier...
And because I can't communicate much, I'm also re-learning the power of prayer.
Looking Ahead...
And so here's kind of what the rest of my stay here will look like, at least as far as I know now.
Thursday, June 3: Errands with Philips + Aaron, Lunch at the Rathaus (cultural experience, according to Kelley and Aaron), back to the Asian store to get extra stuff for the sushi party and to hopefully have more conversation with the guy there.
Friday, June 4: Sushi party. Rhonda is inviting her Japanese friends, Aaron's going to try to invite some friends from language school, I think Mely is inviting her neighbour whose brother is working in China but is here to visit. And we're also going to try to invite the guy running the Asian store.
Saturday, June 5: S-Bahn excursion. Ralf has a book that tells where some of the more interesting S-Bahn (trains) stations are. We're going to check a few of those out, and they all have some friends they're hoping to invite.
Sunday, June 6: Grill party at the Havlicks. The Havlicks used to be neighbours with the Philips before they moved to Kreuzberg and the Havlicks to their new place. Even though they don't live in the same neighbourhood anymore, the relationship is still there, and Simone is one of the Mitarbeiters at Teenfreizeit. Their 12-year-old daughter, Renee is a sweetheart, and someone I'd really like to connect with.
Wednesday, June 9: Team meeting
Friday, June 11: World Cup kick off! Aaron and I, and probably Ralf and Adrian are going to watch the Mexico vs. S. Africa game somewhere.
Saturday, June 12: Quick visit to Hannover to hang out with Sieg and Amy.
Sunday, June 13: Church service at Sieg's church, Pre-game grill party, Germany plays at 20:30.
Sunday, June 20: Spanisch party with Mely's and Aaron's friends before Aaron leaves for the US
Tuesday, June 22: Aaron and Kelley leave for the US
Saturday, June 26: Rhonda and Christian leave for the US, possible visit to an old friend.
Friday, July 2: To Fritzlar
Wednesday, July 7: Return from Fritzlar
Friday, July 9: Nachtigalls arrive in Berlin
Sunday, July 11: Welcome dinner for the Nachtigalls
Wednesday, July 14: Philips' return from the US
Monday, July 19: Teenfreizeit prep days
Thursday, July 22: Teenfreizeit
Tuesday, July 27: Return to Berlin
Wednesday, July 28: Return to the US
Alright, I think that's all I have for tonight. I apologise that this is kind of a long one. I'll try to write more frequently so that they will be shorter blurbs rather than a long one like this.
Love you all, and thank you for your prayers, Facebook messages and e-mails. I'm trying to be better at writing back. Really, I am.
31 May 2010
Freckles on my Nose and Holes in my Shoes
I learnt a song in elementary school that goes something like this...
I've got freckles on my nose
Holes in my shoes
The wrong coloured socks
And a missing tooth
I'm not Superman
God, You made me the kid that I am
And...
Thank You God for who I am
I don't have to be a Superman
Thank You God for who I am
All I want to be is your best friend
Sometimes I'm weak
I fall on my knees
I've got skins and bruises
All over me
I'm not Superman
God, You made me the kid that I am
And...
Thank You God for who I am
I don't have to be a Superman
Thank You God for who I am
All I want to be is your best friend
For whatever reason, this is the song that has been stuck in my head all morning. I haven't heard that song in years, but then it dawned on me that this IS the song for this moment - or maybe just my life in general. Some days my socks are mismatched, other days I'm just the awkward kid in the room. Some days I trip over my own feet, other days I just have to laugh at myself and remind myself I'm really not Superman (or woman for those of you needing the political correctness).
But in spite of all that, this is the very reason I'm in Berlin - learning what it means to be the best friend I can be even if I'm awkward, mismatched and messy. To build intentional relationships even if I'm only here for a short time. To embrace brokenness in community and to find healing together. Like a stained glass art formed by pieces of broken glass pieced together by the Master Artist, we can only find true beauty when we step back and look at the bigger picture. When we see how our stories are put together and allow the Light of the Master to shine through, that's when we find meaning in our individual stories - not in insolation, but in community. And it is within this safe circle of friendship that we find the space to be creative with our giftedness to give back to each other, and to the community in which we live in.
And who better to have as mentors for this internship than Kelley and Rhonda?
Kelley sees the big picture and is never willing to put God or ministry in a box. He dreams big and is always willing to step aside and let someone else more gifted than he is in certain areas to take charge. Most importantly, he reminds me of the importance of laughter so that life and ministry won't drive us over the edge.
Rhonda on the other hand is the personification of hospitality. Growing up in a home where my brother and I always knew the kids from youth group can (and usually are dying to) come and hang out if they didn't want to go home, Mum did an exceptional job teaching us about hospitality. Rhonda reminds me of the warmth of hospitality such as remembering the simple things like an extra toothbrush, or celebrating life's big moments like birthdays or the day a husband comes home from war.
What can I say? I may have freckles on my nose and holes in my shoes, but as long as I remain obedient on this journey of faith, God knows.
I've got freckles on my nose
Holes in my shoes
The wrong coloured socks
And a missing tooth
I'm not Superman
God, You made me the kid that I am
And...
Thank You God for who I am
I don't have to be a Superman
Thank You God for who I am
All I want to be is your best friend
Sometimes I'm weak
I fall on my knees
I've got skins and bruises
All over me
I'm not Superman
God, You made me the kid that I am
And...
Thank You God for who I am
I don't have to be a Superman
Thank You God for who I am
All I want to be is your best friend
For whatever reason, this is the song that has been stuck in my head all morning. I haven't heard that song in years, but then it dawned on me that this IS the song for this moment - or maybe just my life in general. Some days my socks are mismatched, other days I'm just the awkward kid in the room. Some days I trip over my own feet, other days I just have to laugh at myself and remind myself I'm really not Superman (or woman for those of you needing the political correctness).
But in spite of all that, this is the very reason I'm in Berlin - learning what it means to be the best friend I can be even if I'm awkward, mismatched and messy. To build intentional relationships even if I'm only here for a short time. To embrace brokenness in community and to find healing together. Like a stained glass art formed by pieces of broken glass pieced together by the Master Artist, we can only find true beauty when we step back and look at the bigger picture. When we see how our stories are put together and allow the Light of the Master to shine through, that's when we find meaning in our individual stories - not in insolation, but in community. And it is within this safe circle of friendship that we find the space to be creative with our giftedness to give back to each other, and to the community in which we live in.
And who better to have as mentors for this internship than Kelley and Rhonda?
Kelley sees the big picture and is never willing to put God or ministry in a box. He dreams big and is always willing to step aside and let someone else more gifted than he is in certain areas to take charge. Most importantly, he reminds me of the importance of laughter so that life and ministry won't drive us over the edge.
Rhonda on the other hand is the personification of hospitality. Growing up in a home where my brother and I always knew the kids from youth group can (and usually are dying to) come and hang out if they didn't want to go home, Mum did an exceptional job teaching us about hospitality. Rhonda reminds me of the warmth of hospitality such as remembering the simple things like an extra toothbrush, or celebrating life's big moments like birthdays or the day a husband comes home from war.
What can I say? I may have freckles on my nose and holes in my shoes, but as long as I remain obedient on this journey of faith, God knows.
28 May 2010
Happy Cherries and Other Randomness...
Well, it's been a while since I last wrote here. My brain is full, body exhausted and I think I might be ready to crash.
A quick summary of all that has happened in the last week:
We went back to the Kaiser Wilhelm Friedrich church on Sunday for the Pentecost service. It took me till about halfway through the service before I finally figured out what was going on. It was meaningful in that it demonstrated the different tongues that were spoken on the day of Pentecost.
Monday was spent sanding and priming the door frames and floor boards of a building for a ministry site. It was probably the hardest physical labour we've put in all trip, and when I woke up the next morning, I realised that even all the walking we've done in the last couple weeks didn't match up to the labour we put in on Monday. Or maybe I'm just really out of shape. Who knows :)
Monday evening we had dinner at this place called Matthew's Table. It's kind of like a steriod version of what I would like to do eventually. Basically, the idea is that they host meals and parties for anyone and everyone in their neighbourhood, and over the dinner table, conversations happen so that these people experience the love of a Christ community.
Tuesday was kind of a free day until the evening when we went to visit Klaus' Abendbrot. This place functions as a cafe, bar and almost like a home where people can come in to relax, get creative, or use the workshop space to fix things. Daniel explained that one of their main values is in social justice and standing up for the ones who have little.
Dinner on Tuesday was A-mazing. We went to a Thai and Sushi place and I had some of the best Tom Yum soup and green curry.
Wednesday was a free day. Dan and I spent most of the day exploring and trying to find our way around the city. But he also got some of his souvenir and Christmas shopping done which turned out perfect since the group here for the Urban Ministry class left this morning.
In all, I'll have to say that the last couple weeks have been stretching, tiring but also I'm not sure when was the last time I've laughed as much as I did. Between the hysterics of the guys and the girls egging them on, it was laughter to no end.
Today was kind of a quieter day. We got up early this morning to send the group off to the airport then came back for breakfast. After that we all crashed for a couple hours before getting up to do laundry. I also moved my stuff down to the Philips' apartment and unpacked my stuff into the room where I'll be for the next two months. It's kind of a nice feeling to finally be able to settle in.
Unfortunately, this is also when the other pieces of crossing culture will come in. Tomorrow evening, we will be hosting a group that will be here for Teenfreizeit, which is the summer camp for the teens of the Church of God in Germany. This will be when English will be the minority language (and Mandarin even less) and I'll have to force myself to remember as much from Deutsch klassen as I can and hopefully find enough stamina to keep up for the entire weekend that the group is here.
Also, with the group gone now, this will be me living in a new culture by myself again. Even though I really needed my personal space while the group was here, they were at least a little more familiar to me than being in Germany by myself is.
Hey, if you think of it, here are a few things I would really appreciate prayer for for the next few days...
1) Teenfreizeit group:
Pray that everything will go smoothly and for the training pieces to come together.
2) Language:
I don't think I really understood how mentally exhausting it is to try to listen to a conversation in German and try to catch as many words as I can possibly understand, then try to make sense of what's going on. Pray for the mental energy, and that I will not get too frustrated with myself for not being able to understand more.
3) Well-being:
The last three weeks or so have been exhausting mentally, physically and emotionally. I'm not sure I would really call this homesickness yet, but there's definitely a longing for something familiar. Pray that I will be able to find joy in simple things as I adjust to living here.
And in returning thanks, here are a few things I've been really thankful for:
1) Kelley, Rhonda, Christian and Aaron for their hospitality and the way they simply opened up their lives to not only our group, but also the people at the ministry sites we've been to. There's nothing more inspiring than watching the smile light up the faces of the people you're working with, knowing that they're not just doing that because God or the Bible said so, or because it's the "Christian" thing to do - but because they REALLY care.
2) For people who continue to pour out their lives not simply into ministries, but into other people. For the reminder that people are ALWAYS more important and valuable than things.
3) The group from AU here for the Urban Ministry class, for the reminder to laugh with others and at myself.
I'm also thankful that my window is right by the main street so I can fall asleep to the sounds of the city again like I had the first eighteen years of my life :)
And of course, I'm thankful for you, for your prayers, and for taking time to read this and to keep up with my journey.
A quick summary of all that has happened in the last week:
We went back to the Kaiser Wilhelm Friedrich church on Sunday for the Pentecost service. It took me till about halfway through the service before I finally figured out what was going on. It was meaningful in that it demonstrated the different tongues that were spoken on the day of Pentecost.
Monday was spent sanding and priming the door frames and floor boards of a building for a ministry site. It was probably the hardest physical labour we've put in all trip, and when I woke up the next morning, I realised that even all the walking we've done in the last couple weeks didn't match up to the labour we put in on Monday. Or maybe I'm just really out of shape. Who knows :)
Monday evening we had dinner at this place called Matthew's Table. It's kind of like a steriod version of what I would like to do eventually. Basically, the idea is that they host meals and parties for anyone and everyone in their neighbourhood, and over the dinner table, conversations happen so that these people experience the love of a Christ community.
Tuesday was kind of a free day until the evening when we went to visit Klaus' Abendbrot. This place functions as a cafe, bar and almost like a home where people can come in to relax, get creative, or use the workshop space to fix things. Daniel explained that one of their main values is in social justice and standing up for the ones who have little.
Dinner on Tuesday was A-mazing. We went to a Thai and Sushi place and I had some of the best Tom Yum soup and green curry.
Wednesday was a free day. Dan and I spent most of the day exploring and trying to find our way around the city. But he also got some of his souvenir and Christmas shopping done which turned out perfect since the group here for the Urban Ministry class left this morning.
In all, I'll have to say that the last couple weeks have been stretching, tiring but also I'm not sure when was the last time I've laughed as much as I did. Between the hysterics of the guys and the girls egging them on, it was laughter to no end.
Today was kind of a quieter day. We got up early this morning to send the group off to the airport then came back for breakfast. After that we all crashed for a couple hours before getting up to do laundry. I also moved my stuff down to the Philips' apartment and unpacked my stuff into the room where I'll be for the next two months. It's kind of a nice feeling to finally be able to settle in.
Unfortunately, this is also when the other pieces of crossing culture will come in. Tomorrow evening, we will be hosting a group that will be here for Teenfreizeit, which is the summer camp for the teens of the Church of God in Germany. This will be when English will be the minority language (and Mandarin even less) and I'll have to force myself to remember as much from Deutsch klassen as I can and hopefully find enough stamina to keep up for the entire weekend that the group is here.
Also, with the group gone now, this will be me living in a new culture by myself again. Even though I really needed my personal space while the group was here, they were at least a little more familiar to me than being in Germany by myself is.
Hey, if you think of it, here are a few things I would really appreciate prayer for for the next few days...
1) Teenfreizeit group:
Pray that everything will go smoothly and for the training pieces to come together.
2) Language:
I don't think I really understood how mentally exhausting it is to try to listen to a conversation in German and try to catch as many words as I can possibly understand, then try to make sense of what's going on. Pray for the mental energy, and that I will not get too frustrated with myself for not being able to understand more.
3) Well-being:
The last three weeks or so have been exhausting mentally, physically and emotionally. I'm not sure I would really call this homesickness yet, but there's definitely a longing for something familiar. Pray that I will be able to find joy in simple things as I adjust to living here.
And in returning thanks, here are a few things I've been really thankful for:
1) Kelley, Rhonda, Christian and Aaron for their hospitality and the way they simply opened up their lives to not only our group, but also the people at the ministry sites we've been to. There's nothing more inspiring than watching the smile light up the faces of the people you're working with, knowing that they're not just doing that because God or the Bible said so, or because it's the "Christian" thing to do - but because they REALLY care.
2) For people who continue to pour out their lives not simply into ministries, but into other people. For the reminder that people are ALWAYS more important and valuable than things.
3) The group from AU here for the Urban Ministry class, for the reminder to laugh with others and at myself.
I'm also thankful that my window is right by the main street so I can fall asleep to the sounds of the city again like I had the first eighteen years of my life :)
And of course, I'm thankful for you, for your prayers, and for taking time to read this and to keep up with my journey.
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